Trabalho realizado no pelo 2º D no 4º bimestre de 2009 no CIC Damas - Campina Grande - PB.

1. Como aprender inglês através de piadas

2. Se você realmente quer aprender uma língua estrangeira, então compreender piadas contadas neste idioma é também muito importante, pois elas auxiliam não somente na compreensão estrutural e gramatical do idioma, como também nos aspectos culturais de onde ele é falado.Piadas em inglês são sempre uma boa fonte de aprendizado. Todo mundo curte ler e ouvir piadas, as quais são cheias de phrasalverbs e slangs (gírias) que você pode aplicar na conversação do inglês cotidiano. Se você não entender a piada em inglês, terá motivação para descobrir o significado das gírias, jargões, expressões idiomáticase vocabulário, pois você quer rir, assim como os outros que entendem, e não ficar "por fora"!

3. Inclusive, em alguns cursos de inglês essa técnica da utilização de piadas como forma de aprendizagem está presente, nos livros, até mesmo os professores utilizam piadas pára interagir com os alunos, porque querendo ou não é uma outra forma de ter contato com o Inglês se divertindo.

4. Vejamos alguns exemplos: -Como piadas podem ajudar na compreensão dos tempos verbais, percebemos que uma mesma piada pode ser contada em mais de um tempo verbal, tanto no presente, quanto no passado, o que na hora de contar uma historia em inglês, por exemplo, ajuda a não confundir e saber a diferença. - Em uma mesma piada há mais de um tempo verbal ao mesmo tempo, e pode ter a voz ativa e a passiva, também na mesma piada.

5. Two Balloons (Present Tense Version) – Two balloons are floating across the desert.One balloon says to the other:"Look out for the cactussssssssssss!“ Two Balloons (Past Tense Version) Two balloons were floating across the desert.One balloon said to the other:"Look out for the cactussssssssssss!"

6. -Podemos perceber também que em inglês há abreviações, no dia-a-dia principalmente, e que eles sabem fazer humor com isso. Exemplo. Boyfriend: What is your favorite music group?Girlfriend: I love U2!Boyfriend: I love you too, but what is your favorite music group?

7. -Também podemos aprender expressões típicas da língua. The science teacher explained to his class that long waves can go round objects but short waves cannot. Seeing blank faces, he picked up his hat, held it in front of his face and asked the nearest pupil, "Can you see my face?""No sir.""Can you hear my voice?""Yes sir.""What does that show?" He hoped for the answer that sound waves are long and light waves short, but the boy retorted hopefully,"You're talking through your hat, sir."*be talking through your hat = to talk nonsense - to be talking about a subject as if you know a lot about it when in fact you know very little.

8. -As piadas também podem nos ensinar os numerais, ou ao menos nos incentivar a buscar conhece-los melhor. 2x10=2x11 Why is two times ten the same as two times eleven? Because two times ten is twenty, and two times eleven is twenty, too!

9. -Você pode aprender novos verbos e suas conjugações, tanto no presente, passado, particípio. Aprender o que é preciso para dizer ou perguntar no futuro. Doctor A man goes to the doctor and says "Doctor, please help me, I'm hurt all over" The doctor asked the man to explain more. The man said, “When I touch my arm it hurts, When I touch my leg it hurts, when I touch my head it hurts. Everywhere I touch it hurts" The doctor examined the man and said. "Mr. Smith, your finger is broken*"

10. -Você pode espandir seu vocabulário, e aprender “possessive’s”-Também podem sem aprendidos advérbios.

11. Apresentamos a seguir outras piadas em inglês, Leia-as e veja se você as compreende. Se gostar de uma ou mais, tente aprendê-las(s) e treiná-la(s) contando-a(s) para alguém.

12. The CheckupA man goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. He hasn`t been feeling welland wants to find out if he`s ill. After the checkup the doctor comes outwith the results of the examination."I`m afraid I have some bad news. You`re dying and you don`t have muchtime, " the doctor says."Oh no, that`s terrible. How long have I got? " The man asks."10. . . " Says the doctor."10? 10 What? Months? Weeks? What?! " He asks desperately."10. . . 9. . . 8. . . 7. . .

13. CIA, FBI and LAPD The CIA, the FBI, and the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later dragging a badly beaten bear. The bear is screaming, "Okay, okay! I'm a RABBIT!! I'm a RABBIT!!"

14. Themonster A man returned home earlier than usual. His son met him, very upset, and crying,"Daddy, there's a monster in your bedroom.""There's a what?""A monster. And he's hidden in mummy's wardrobe."So the man went upstairs, found his wife in bed and opened the wardrobe door. Inside, his oldest friend tried vainly to hide himself behind a rack of dresses."Twenty years, you've been my friend," bellowed the husband, pulling his former friend out by the hair, "And the best thing you can find to do is frighten my little boy."

15. Drunk ManOne completely drunk man stood under the Nelson's Column and poured off.A bobby came up to him and said:- Excuse me, sir. But it's the Nelson's Column*... - I fuck your Nelson! - Excuse me, sir. But it's a public place...- I fuck your public! - Excuse me, sir. But the Queen has a promenade** here sometimes. - I fuck your queen!!! - Indeed?! - In bed!- Oh, I am sorry your majesty! ( OBS: * Nelson's Column is a monument in Trafalgar Square, London, England. The column was built between 1840 and 1843 to commemorate Admiral Horatio Nelson's death at the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805. He was one of Britain's best-loved heroes, who fought valiantly for his country and won four notable naval battles, at the personal cost of losing an arm and one eye.**Promenade - A leisurely walk, especially one taken in a public place as a social activity )

16. British CannibalA cannibal spent four years studying at Oxford University*. At the end of it, he was asked,"When you return to the jungle, will you still continue to eat human flesh?""Of course I will," he replied, "But I'll always use a knife and fork."*Oxford is a famous English university in the town of Oxford. Oxford English is believed to be the purest English with the most prestigious pronunciation. Many people who live in Oxford do not speak it. Many educated people who do not live in Oxford or even in England, speak it.

17. Scotsman McTavish, a Scotsman*, went to a ski resort. He told the instructor,"I want to learn to ski on one leg.""Certainly sir, but why?""I'll only need to hire one ski." *The people of Scotland have a reputation for meanness. They are proud of it and call it "canny". You will find many jokes based on Scottish meanness

18. TheScienceTeacherThe science teacher explained to his class that long waves can go round objects but short waves cannot. Seeing blank faces, he picked up his hat, held it in front of his face and asked the nearest pupil, "Can you see my face?""No sir.""Can you hear my voice?""Yes sir.""What does that show?" He hoped for the answer that sound waves are long and light waves short, but the boy retorted hopefully,"You're talking through your hat, sir." *

19. Good MannersA teacher was giving her class of small children a lesson on good manners."Suppose, by mistake, you step on a lady's foot. What do you do?""I say pardon me.""Very good. Now suppose the lady, to reward you, gives you a coin. What do you do?""Step on the other foot to get a second one.

20. Don't generalizeIn a school in the States, the teacher had just described Christopher Columbus' discovery of America."Just imagine, children, if he had not risked the ocean, you would not be here today. Wasn't he marvellous?"All the children cheered, except one."Aren't you pleased young fellow?""No miss.""Why?""I'manIndian."

21. Doubled A man complained to his neighbour at the bar, "Yesterday, I thought I'd solved all my problems. I thought I'd found a way to forget my mother-in-law. I went to the pub and got drunk.""Did it work?""No, when I got home I found two of her waiting." *Note that the plural is not mother-in-laws, but mothers-in-law.

22. Boozed *to drown your sorrows = to drink until you forget your problems.**booze = alcoholicdrink “ What's this I hear, old pal? Your wife's left you, old man? Well, why don't you go home and drown your sorrows* in booze**?""Impossible.""No booze?""No sorrow."

23. Amazing thing A man was sitting at the bar in a watering hole whose selling point was that it was on top of the largest skyscraper in town. Another man walks in and asks the bartender for a Jack Daniel's. He downs it, and then takes a running leap out the window. Much to everybody's surprise, he floats back up and climbs through the window back into the bar. The man at the bar is amazed and asks the man how he did it."Easy," says the man. "Outside this window are some very strong wind currents which can carry you back to the window." "Wow," says the man at the bar. "I gotta try this." He takes a running leap out the window and falls to a horrible, bloody, and flat death. "Geez, Superman," says the bartender. "You can be a real a jerk when you're drunk."

24. At The Hospital-- Doctor, what have I got?-- I don`t know yet, but we will find out in the autopsy

25. The Sex of FliesA woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around witha fly swatter."What are you doing? " She asked."Hunting Flies" He responded."Oh. Killing any? " She asked."Yep, 3 males, 2 Females, " he replied.Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell? "He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone! "

26. What is the difference between the suicide man and the virgin? The suicide man Tries To Die, and the virgin Dies To Try! . .

27. Some men were working at a sawmill when one of them got too close to the blade and had his ear lopped off. The guys quickly started rummaging through the sawdust looking for the ear. "I found it!" exclaimed a co-worker. "Keep looking," said the earless one. "Mine had a pencil behind it."

28. A young guy who's never picked up a golf club decides to take lessons. The pro shows him the basics, then says, "Okay, now try to hit the ball towards the flag on the first green." The novice tees off and drive the ball 300 yards. It lands on the green, just inches from the hole. "Now what?" he says. "Uh," stammers the pro, "you're supposed to hit the ball into the cup." The beginner says, "Now you tell me?!"

29. Two guys are moving about in a supermarket when their carts collide. One says to the other, "I'm sorry - I was looking for my wife." "What a coincidence, so am I, and I'm getting a little desperate." "Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?" "She's tall, with long hair, long legs, firm boobs and a tight ass. What's your wife look like?" "Never mind, let's look for yours!"

30. Thinking about jerk. Aman was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine. Officer: You were speeding. Man: No, I wasn't. Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket. Man: But I wasn't speeding. Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.) Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk? Officer: Yes, you would. Man: What if I just thought that you were? Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think. Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!

31. A man wanted to buy his son a parrot as a birthday present. The next day he went to the pet shop and saw three identical parrots in a cage. He asked the clerk, "how much for the parrot on the right? The owner said it was $250. "$250", the man said. "Well what does he do? " He knows how to use all of the functions of Microsoft Office 2000, responds the clerk. "He can do all of your spreadsheets and type all of your letters." The man then asked what the second parrot cost. The clerk replied, $500, but he not only knows Office 2000, but is an expert computer programmer. Finally, the man inquired about the cost of the last parrot. The clerk replied, "$1,000." Curious as to how a bird can cost $1,000, the man asked what this bird's specialty was. The clerk replies, "Well to be honest I haven't seen him do anything. But the other two call him "BOSS"!!

32. Enfim, isso é só um pouco que podemos aprender, e perceber em inglês, é só ter vontade de buscar os significados e aplicar no dia-a-dia e no aprendizado. Afinal através de piadas é muito mais divertido.

33. Grupo : Ana ClaraAndrezaArella LeonardoRayanne RaquelWennya MariaSérie: 2 anoTurma: DProfessor: FredTema: piadas