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Welcome back to the Vetinari Dualegacy! This is Chapter 18.25: Gambit.

Last time, Gen 7 got kicked off with Xander's alien twins Fuller and Marconi, Rizzo's son Carver,
and Xander's second set of alien twins, Faraday and Tesla. Assorted cousins also spawned, and
Archie was invited to a mysterious bar by none other than Cypress.

Prettacy first!
Rizzo teaches Carver to talk. He rolls all sorts of Wants for Carver.
Dora takes care of walking. She might not roll a whole lot of non-cheese-related Wants, but she
doesn't mind spending time with her family.
Do you know what this is?
If you said "Dora's 200th Grilled Cheese Sandwich," you'd be right.

One more Permaplat Sim, one more Impossible Want point!
Much fun was had by all, until the Blue Puke Incident.
"Are you going to make a 'bad cheese sandwich' joke?"
"...Why would I not know the difference between indigestion and pregnancy?"
"I have no idea."
This is Anne, aka not-Warren. She does not look as cool as Warren.
See? Warren's got Random White Leg. Yay Warren!

Dora sold Anne to Chad. Now they can re-adopt one of Colin's failed mates for Warren.
"Wow... Uncle Chad has a lot of nice points."
"Hiiiii, Carver! It's your birrrrthdaaaayyyyy!"
Survey says, still a mini-Rizzo! Carver's a cutie-pie!

Of course, now that the main household kids are growing up, the cousins and assorted hangers-
on are as well...
Remember Niobe? She's Cam's half-alien daughter and Rocky's stepdaughter.

Jesse adores her too. I've never seen a dog stalk a toddler as much as he stalked her.
"Cam! When you break the shower, we have to fix it!"
"You can't be mad at me when I'm doing the Creepy Nice Point smile!"
"Do you really think you can grin your way out of this?"
"Yes!"
"...You might be right about that."
Anyway, Niobe grows up, and she gets to be a girly-girl.
Niobe's cousin Scott also has a loving family. Sheldon is always there for tickles and snuggles.
Georgia invited her family back over for Scott's birthday, and Cam proves that yes, he has too
many nice points and not enough outgoing points.
Scotty's really meshed his parents' features--that's Georgia's Stabby Death Nose and Sheldon's
eye shape.
Meanwhile, Fee teaches Kate how to talk.
The hard work done, Reed teaches Kate all about how marriage and ZOMG BABIES are the best
things ever! You can never start that Family Sim indoctrination too early.
Kate grows up cute! She really looks a lot like Fee.
Fee's cousin Bee teaches Connor how to walk. Cutie Connor catches on pretty quickly.
Connor is talking about the moon.

Victor is naked.

I will leave you to come up with your own caption here.
Future SimSelf bait here! I mean, c'mon, just look at that face. He's cute, and he knows it!
Simon and Pen's daughter Brooke loves to give Cordelia cuddles.
If she had her druthers, Cordelia would be playing with River instead.
Simon teaches River to talk, and then goes for the autonomous playing, while Cordelia watches to
make sure nothing goes awry.
Pen teaches Brooke to walk.


Penguingirl writes the Penguino Legacy.
Toddler training accomplished, Pen and Simon get in a little "alone time."
That's Brooke on the left with the buns and River on the right with the braids. There are a few
subtle differences in their faces, but they mostly look identical.
Over at the Uglacy, Brittany's on feeding duty for her new stepkids. They might not cost $5000 in
Buy Mode, but she gets along with them just the same.
Of course, Xander grabs Tess when it's time for a bottle.
"See? Proof that you don't have to have nice points to hug your brother."
"Let's pillow fight!"
"Okay!"
"Marco, what's that?!"
"...It's the wall, Bucky. It's the wall every time it's your turn."
"Is not."
"Is so."
"Yeah, you're right."
"You know, most people make me lobster or pork chops or salmon."
"You'll eat your grilled cheese and you'll like it. And you'll let those two funmeisters into private
school."
"I've heard about the guy with the fauxhawk."
"Pleasure doing business with you."
Carver's a funmeister too. Yet another tub pirate!
"I better not have to do this again, Romance Boy!"
"No, no, you're good."
"You wanna take this one?"
"Um... Whaddaya mean 'this one'?"
This is Bell, a boy with blonde hair and green eyes all the way back from Tom.
And this is Whitney, a girl with Rizzo's blue eyes and Zoe's red hair.

The Prettacy twins are officially the last of Gen 7!
The younger Uglacy twins are growing up too, much to the cake-loving joy of Bucky and Marco.
Brittany's the only one awake, so she grabs Tess first.
Yup. That's six generations of Uglacy meeting the PolliTech.

Tesla's a Pisces 10/3/10/1/10. Yup--super serious, and maxed nice. Compared to her playful and
mean brothers, she really IS an alien!
Brittany grabs Fair next.
And Fair proves strangely cute.

Faraday's a Taurus 9/7/5/10/0. Another with maxed playful and no nice points. Poor little Tess.
Fair's cute, but maybe not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Tess and Fair aren't the only ones growing up.
This is Kennedy as an adult.
And Wesley all grown up in a pee puddle. Wesley was sold to Georgia.
Brittany tops Law, making her Permaplat, and giving me two Permaplat adults in the house, which
is going to make toddler training a little easier this time around.
Brittany takes care of Fair's walking and talking.
Xander manages to kick himself into Gold to teach Tess how to walk and talk.
"And it's not even an evil kite!"
"Who wants kites when you can rake leaves? ...Wait, what am I saying?"
Marco and Bucky aren't the only ones who like to have fun.

"I don't feel bad about pillow fighting because you're not pregnant anymore!"
"A pillow isn't going to hurt a baby."
"Why risk it?"
"You're not going to barf on me, are you? Of course not!"
Rizzo's getting Aspiration for playing with Bell. That just makes me love him even more. Proof that
not all Romance Sims are insatiable and skanky!
Zoe's good with the kids too. She wanders by and tucks Whitney in.
"YAY CAKE!"
Whitney! She looks a bit more like Zoe, especially around the mouth. She's a Sagittarius
2/9/9/10/5. Yet another kiddo with maxed playful!
Bell! He looks like he's got Zoe's cheeks, but mostly the rest of Rizzo's features. He's another
Sagittarius, but with Rizzo's personality: 2/3/9/10/5.

Back to the Uglacy!
Fair's a bit of a brat, and the fact that he passed out on the floor was mostly his own fault. It's cute
of Brittany to worry about him, though. Or maybe she's worried about what's going to happen
when he wakes up.
Bucky surprised me by doing this all on his own. Sitting down and playing with Tess!
Carver showed up for Fair and Tess's birthday.
Fair is still cute!
Tess is a bit less lumpy, but girls always wear the features better than guys.

And now to finish up the kiddification...
An Energized Zoe teaches Bell how to talk.
And immediately turns around and teaches Whitney how to talk.
When it comes to walking, Dora's there for Bell.
Whitney learns to walk from her grandma as well.
Boring toddler stuff aside, it's time for the last kiddies of Gen 7 to become children!
Bell! He's got Rizzo's nose, but I can see Zoe in his face too.
Whitney takes after Zoe a bit more. She's definitely got Zoe's full lips!

Lightning hit a tree outside. They have not yet discovered a way to light walls on fire.
At the Uglacy, Tess and Fair play Cops & Robbers. Tess is doing the smart thing by being the cop.
She's far too nice to kick Fair, and doesn't have to worry about him kicking her.
Snow day! All four kids were enjoying the snowball fight, but then the bus showed up for Fair and
Tess, who weren't in private school like Bucky and Marco, who got the day off.
"This is so going to be an evil snowman."
"Yup."
"Evil snowmen are way better than nice snowmen."
"Yup."
"Hmmm... I think the scowly face needs to go right about here."
"Looks good to me!"
"Is the mouth on right, Bucky?"
"Sure is! Nice and cranky."
After a hard day of goofing off in the snow, it was time for Bucky and Marco to grow up.
"Yikes! Marconi is not made of gold!"

Brittany cracks me up.
"The hair works."
It does.

Fuller Vetinari, Sagittarius 8/1/10/10/0. Bucky rolled Fortune, with the LTW to be Hall of Famer. I
can see shy, mean Bucky as a Fortune Sim.
"What happened to my eyes?"
I don't know. My pretty custom alien eye defaults have gone AWOL.

Marconi Vetinari is a Taurus 7/7/6/10/2. Marco rolled Pleasure, with the LTW of 50 First Dates.
Since he's a Pleasure Sim, he'll be my Black Sheep, because he won't care if he doesn't go to
college.

Heading back to the Prettacy...
Topher skipped work to have a water balloon fight with Carver, Bell, and Whitney, so you know
what that means.
"You made me feel safe, Topher. I don't know what I'll do without my White Knight around."
"You'll be fine. Rizzo's here, and we have three amazing grandkids."
"I'll be with you again soon enough, I suppose."
"Don't say that."
"Bye, Dad. Thanks for everything."
"We had a good run, Dora."
"I'm glad I let myself love you."
Everybody started bawling. Even Warren the cat was taking it hard.
" 'Kay, brah, we got beaches and skill points and puppies and whatever else you want!"
"Spicoli, I already got everything I want!"
"You're making this job really easy."
Christopher Royce Vetinari, Gen 5 Prettacy spouse, went Permaplat off of Max 7 Skills and then
topped 5 careers for me.

Topher lived 79 days. He has two children, Eratosthenes and Ptolemaeus, and three
grandchildren, Carver, Bell, and Whitney. He left money to 29 people, including $20K to Dora,
$9700 to Rizzo, $1425 to Bell, $960 to Zoe, and $850 to Whitney.

Topher, I needed the perfect guy for Dora after the "Ellis" incident, and you were that guy. You
were shy and sweet and adored her, and you got rid of Stabby Death Nose. For that alone, I will
be eternally grateful.
And there's Topher's Knowledge Platstone. Another in a long line of great Prettacy spouses.
"Pew pew pew! I'm too nice to kick!"
"Pew pew pew! Me too!"
"I can't watch Carver grow up because he's facing the wall!"
"That's a funny thing to be annoyed about, Romance Boy."
"I look like Dad."
Yes you do.

Carver Vetinari, Taurus 2/9/7/10/5. Carver rolled Pleasure, with the LTW to have 50 First Dates,
same as Marco. With that brown hair, he'll be a spare, but at least he's got playful points, even if I
was hoping he'd roll Family.

And now to catch up with the last spare...
"Pffft. This place is a dump."
"It serves its purpose."
"...I know you. You look like my great-whatever-grandpa Larch. You're Cypress."
"Regrettably, I do look identical to my brother, though I've chosen to avoid that ridiculous
fauxhawk."
"You gonna kill me?"
"If I want you dead, you'll know."
"So why am I here?"
"How about a drink?"
"Well, if you're offering, I'm drinking."
"You seem unafraid."
"Hey, I'm Archie. Scourge of mascots everywhere, and general badass."
"You know, when most people get me somewhere, they wonder what they're supposed to do with
me once they've got me. So what's on your mind?"
"How would you like the chance to get back at your brother?"
"Get back at Xander? What do you mean by that?"
"He's the heir. You're not. Don't you want a little revenge?"
"Hey, Xander's not my favorite person ever, but he's still my brother. He's fun to pick on, and I
can't do that if he's dead."
"You're the one with the Vetinari Nice Point. You're the one with the ruthlessness. You deserve to
be the heir. You got passed over for your birthright. It's only fair to make others suffer for it."
"Don't be an idiot. This way, I don't have to die. I can WooHoo SimSelves until this whole thing's
over. I'll take eternal life, thanks. And I'm betting you feel the same way, or you'd have been dust
ages ago."
"You don't have to take over and die. You just have to hurt them. In fact, it's better if you don't take
over. The Dualegacy destroyed as easily as the right death at the right time. A win for our team."
"That's your gig, not mine, you psycho. Xander's cool with being heir, I'm cool with not being heir,
why mess with it?"
"Look, I could use someone like you on my side. You're mean, clever, and utterly nasty."
"What do you say? Have another drink and join me."
"No. What's in it for me? Sounds like a whole lotta not-fun and a whole lotta not-WooHoo, and a
whole lotta killing my brother whom I can't torment if he's dead. So, no. Thanks for the offer, but
I'm outta here. Don't contact me again. Maybe I don't want Xander dead, but you, I could take or
leave."
"You should have taken that second drink, boy."
"Why's that, old man?"
"Because it contained the antidote to the poison I put in the first one."
"You said you weren't going to kill me!"
"You should have opened your ears. I said if I wanted you dead, you'd know. And now you do."
"But..."
"Someone like you is either with me or against me. You made your choice. I hope it was worth it."
"Hurry it up, would you? I haven't got all day."
"Hey, Dad, the kitchen's clean. Uh..."
"...Why is there a dead person on the floor?"
"He chose poorly. Do you have a problem with that?"
"No. But I'm pretty sure this is a health code violation."

...Archie...

...Coco... I knew you. I liked you. And I couldn't stop Dad from killing your son.

I'm so sorry.
"Grab that, would you? We have a little errand to run."
"Perfect. Just perfect."
"We should go, Dad. If someone catches us here, things could get hairy."
"What are they going to do? Make annoyed faces at us?"
"The smart thing to do is not stick around to gloat."
"Oh, all right. We've done what we came here to do."
"Xander? There's something on the lawn. Will you go see what it is?"
Archie...

What happened to you?
"Xander, what is it?"
"Mom..."
"Is that... Is that Archie?"
"I don't know how it happened."
"How could he have died? He was supposed to live forever!"
"Mom, it'll be okay. We'll figure it out."
"Dad? What's going on? Why's Grandma crying?"
"Go back inside, boys. Go make Tess and Fair breakfast. Both of you."
"But, Dad--"
"Now, boys."
"Call your father. If Archie's dead, things have changed. I think it's time we had a talk."
"It can wait, Mom."
"I don't think it can. Too much is at stake."
"It can wait a little longer."
"I shouldn't have had to bury my son."
The  Vetinari  Dualegacy  Chapter 18 25

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The Vetinari Dualegacy Chapter 18 25

  • 1.
  • 2. Welcome back to the Vetinari Dualegacy! This is Chapter 18.25: Gambit. Last time, Gen 7 got kicked off with Xander's alien twins Fuller and Marconi, Rizzo's son Carver, and Xander's second set of alien twins, Faraday and Tesla. Assorted cousins also spawned, and Archie was invited to a mysterious bar by none other than Cypress. Prettacy first!
  • 3. Rizzo teaches Carver to talk. He rolls all sorts of Wants for Carver.
  • 4. Dora takes care of walking. She might not roll a whole lot of non-cheese-related Wants, but she doesn't mind spending time with her family.
  • 5. Do you know what this is?
  • 6. If you said "Dora's 200th Grilled Cheese Sandwich," you'd be right. One more Permaplat Sim, one more Impossible Want point!
  • 7. Much fun was had by all, until the Blue Puke Incident.
  • 8. "Are you going to make a 'bad cheese sandwich' joke?" "...Why would I not know the difference between indigestion and pregnancy?" "I have no idea."
  • 9. This is Anne, aka not-Warren. She does not look as cool as Warren.
  • 10. See? Warren's got Random White Leg. Yay Warren! Dora sold Anne to Chad. Now they can re-adopt one of Colin's failed mates for Warren.
  • 11. "Wow... Uncle Chad has a lot of nice points." "Hiiiii, Carver! It's your birrrrthdaaaayyyyy!"
  • 12. Survey says, still a mini-Rizzo! Carver's a cutie-pie! Of course, now that the main household kids are growing up, the cousins and assorted hangers- on are as well...
  • 13. Remember Niobe? She's Cam's half-alien daughter and Rocky's stepdaughter. Jesse adores her too. I've never seen a dog stalk a toddler as much as he stalked her.
  • 14. "Cam! When you break the shower, we have to fix it!" "You can't be mad at me when I'm doing the Creepy Nice Point smile!" "Do you really think you can grin your way out of this?" "Yes!" "...You might be right about that."
  • 15. Anyway, Niobe grows up, and she gets to be a girly-girl.
  • 16. Niobe's cousin Scott also has a loving family. Sheldon is always there for tickles and snuggles.
  • 17. Georgia invited her family back over for Scott's birthday, and Cam proves that yes, he has too many nice points and not enough outgoing points.
  • 18. Scotty's really meshed his parents' features--that's Georgia's Stabby Death Nose and Sheldon's eye shape.
  • 19. Meanwhile, Fee teaches Kate how to talk.
  • 20. The hard work done, Reed teaches Kate all about how marriage and ZOMG BABIES are the best things ever! You can never start that Family Sim indoctrination too early.
  • 21. Kate grows up cute! She really looks a lot like Fee.
  • 22. Fee's cousin Bee teaches Connor how to walk. Cutie Connor catches on pretty quickly.
  • 23. Connor is talking about the moon. Victor is naked. I will leave you to come up with your own caption here.
  • 24. Future SimSelf bait here! I mean, c'mon, just look at that face. He's cute, and he knows it!
  • 25. Simon and Pen's daughter Brooke loves to give Cordelia cuddles.
  • 26. If she had her druthers, Cordelia would be playing with River instead.
  • 27. Simon teaches River to talk, and then goes for the autonomous playing, while Cordelia watches to make sure nothing goes awry.
  • 28. Pen teaches Brooke to walk. Penguingirl writes the Penguino Legacy.
  • 29. Toddler training accomplished, Pen and Simon get in a little "alone time."
  • 30. That's Brooke on the left with the buns and River on the right with the braids. There are a few subtle differences in their faces, but they mostly look identical.
  • 31. Over at the Uglacy, Brittany's on feeding duty for her new stepkids. They might not cost $5000 in Buy Mode, but she gets along with them just the same.
  • 32. Of course, Xander grabs Tess when it's time for a bottle.
  • 33. "See? Proof that you don't have to have nice points to hug your brother." "Let's pillow fight!" "Okay!"
  • 34. "Marco, what's that?!" "...It's the wall, Bucky. It's the wall every time it's your turn." "Is not." "Is so." "Yeah, you're right."
  • 35. "You know, most people make me lobster or pork chops or salmon." "You'll eat your grilled cheese and you'll like it. And you'll let those two funmeisters into private school." "I've heard about the guy with the fauxhawk." "Pleasure doing business with you."
  • 36. Carver's a funmeister too. Yet another tub pirate!
  • 37. "I better not have to do this again, Romance Boy!" "No, no, you're good."
  • 38. "You wanna take this one?" "Um... Whaddaya mean 'this one'?"
  • 39. This is Bell, a boy with blonde hair and green eyes all the way back from Tom.
  • 40. And this is Whitney, a girl with Rizzo's blue eyes and Zoe's red hair. The Prettacy twins are officially the last of Gen 7!
  • 41. The younger Uglacy twins are growing up too, much to the cake-loving joy of Bucky and Marco.
  • 42. Brittany's the only one awake, so she grabs Tess first.
  • 43. Yup. That's six generations of Uglacy meeting the PolliTech. Tesla's a Pisces 10/3/10/1/10. Yup--super serious, and maxed nice. Compared to her playful and mean brothers, she really IS an alien!
  • 45. And Fair proves strangely cute. Faraday's a Taurus 9/7/5/10/0. Another with maxed playful and no nice points. Poor little Tess.
  • 46. Fair's cute, but maybe not the sharpest knife in the drawer. Tess and Fair aren't the only ones growing up.
  • 47. This is Kennedy as an adult.
  • 48. And Wesley all grown up in a pee puddle. Wesley was sold to Georgia.
  • 49. Brittany tops Law, making her Permaplat, and giving me two Permaplat adults in the house, which is going to make toddler training a little easier this time around.
  • 50. Brittany takes care of Fair's walking and talking.
  • 51. Xander manages to kick himself into Gold to teach Tess how to walk and talk.
  • 52. "And it's not even an evil kite!"
  • 53. "Who wants kites when you can rake leaves? ...Wait, what am I saying?"
  • 54. Marco and Bucky aren't the only ones who like to have fun. "I don't feel bad about pillow fighting because you're not pregnant anymore!" "A pillow isn't going to hurt a baby." "Why risk it?"
  • 55. "You're not going to barf on me, are you? Of course not!"
  • 56. Rizzo's getting Aspiration for playing with Bell. That just makes me love him even more. Proof that not all Romance Sims are insatiable and skanky!
  • 57. Zoe's good with the kids too. She wanders by and tucks Whitney in.
  • 59. Whitney! She looks a bit more like Zoe, especially around the mouth. She's a Sagittarius 2/9/9/10/5. Yet another kiddo with maxed playful!
  • 60. Bell! He looks like he's got Zoe's cheeks, but mostly the rest of Rizzo's features. He's another Sagittarius, but with Rizzo's personality: 2/3/9/10/5. Back to the Uglacy!
  • 61. Fair's a bit of a brat, and the fact that he passed out on the floor was mostly his own fault. It's cute of Brittany to worry about him, though. Or maybe she's worried about what's going to happen when he wakes up.
  • 62. Bucky surprised me by doing this all on his own. Sitting down and playing with Tess!
  • 63. Carver showed up for Fair and Tess's birthday.
  • 64. Fair is still cute!
  • 65. Tess is a bit less lumpy, but girls always wear the features better than guys. And now to finish up the kiddification...
  • 66. An Energized Zoe teaches Bell how to talk.
  • 67. And immediately turns around and teaches Whitney how to talk.
  • 68. When it comes to walking, Dora's there for Bell.
  • 69. Whitney learns to walk from her grandma as well.
  • 70. Boring toddler stuff aside, it's time for the last kiddies of Gen 7 to become children!
  • 71. Bell! He's got Rizzo's nose, but I can see Zoe in his face too.
  • 72. Whitney takes after Zoe a bit more. She's definitely got Zoe's full lips! Lightning hit a tree outside. They have not yet discovered a way to light walls on fire.
  • 73. At the Uglacy, Tess and Fair play Cops & Robbers. Tess is doing the smart thing by being the cop. She's far too nice to kick Fair, and doesn't have to worry about him kicking her.
  • 74. Snow day! All four kids were enjoying the snowball fight, but then the bus showed up for Fair and Tess, who weren't in private school like Bucky and Marco, who got the day off.
  • 75. "This is so going to be an evil snowman." "Yup." "Evil snowmen are way better than nice snowmen." "Yup."
  • 76. "Hmmm... I think the scowly face needs to go right about here." "Looks good to me!"
  • 77. "Is the mouth on right, Bucky?" "Sure is! Nice and cranky."
  • 78. After a hard day of goofing off in the snow, it was time for Bucky and Marco to grow up.
  • 79. "Yikes! Marconi is not made of gold!" Brittany cracks me up.
  • 80. "The hair works." It does. Fuller Vetinari, Sagittarius 8/1/10/10/0. Bucky rolled Fortune, with the LTW to be Hall of Famer. I can see shy, mean Bucky as a Fortune Sim.
  • 81. "What happened to my eyes?" I don't know. My pretty custom alien eye defaults have gone AWOL. Marconi Vetinari is a Taurus 7/7/6/10/2. Marco rolled Pleasure, with the LTW of 50 First Dates. Since he's a Pleasure Sim, he'll be my Black Sheep, because he won't care if he doesn't go to college. Heading back to the Prettacy...
  • 82. Topher skipped work to have a water balloon fight with Carver, Bell, and Whitney, so you know what that means.
  • 83. "You made me feel safe, Topher. I don't know what I'll do without my White Knight around." "You'll be fine. Rizzo's here, and we have three amazing grandkids." "I'll be with you again soon enough, I suppose." "Don't say that."
  • 84. "Bye, Dad. Thanks for everything."
  • 85. "We had a good run, Dora." "I'm glad I let myself love you."
  • 86. Everybody started bawling. Even Warren the cat was taking it hard.
  • 87. " 'Kay, brah, we got beaches and skill points and puppies and whatever else you want!" "Spicoli, I already got everything I want!" "You're making this job really easy."
  • 88. Christopher Royce Vetinari, Gen 5 Prettacy spouse, went Permaplat off of Max 7 Skills and then topped 5 careers for me. Topher lived 79 days. He has two children, Eratosthenes and Ptolemaeus, and three grandchildren, Carver, Bell, and Whitney. He left money to 29 people, including $20K to Dora, $9700 to Rizzo, $1425 to Bell, $960 to Zoe, and $850 to Whitney. Topher, I needed the perfect guy for Dora after the "Ellis" incident, and you were that guy. You were shy and sweet and adored her, and you got rid of Stabby Death Nose. For that alone, I will be eternally grateful.
  • 89. And there's Topher's Knowledge Platstone. Another in a long line of great Prettacy spouses.
  • 90. "Pew pew pew! I'm too nice to kick!" "Pew pew pew! Me too!"
  • 91. "I can't watch Carver grow up because he's facing the wall!" "That's a funny thing to be annoyed about, Romance Boy."
  • 92. "I look like Dad." Yes you do. Carver Vetinari, Taurus 2/9/7/10/5. Carver rolled Pleasure, with the LTW to have 50 First Dates, same as Marco. With that brown hair, he'll be a spare, but at least he's got playful points, even if I was hoping he'd roll Family. And now to catch up with the last spare...
  • 93. "Pffft. This place is a dump." "It serves its purpose." "...I know you. You look like my great-whatever-grandpa Larch. You're Cypress." "Regrettably, I do look identical to my brother, though I've chosen to avoid that ridiculous fauxhawk." "You gonna kill me?" "If I want you dead, you'll know." "So why am I here?" "How about a drink?"
  • 94. "Well, if you're offering, I'm drinking." "You seem unafraid." "Hey, I'm Archie. Scourge of mascots everywhere, and general badass."
  • 95. "You know, when most people get me somewhere, they wonder what they're supposed to do with me once they've got me. So what's on your mind?"
  • 96. "How would you like the chance to get back at your brother?"
  • 97. "Get back at Xander? What do you mean by that?"
  • 98. "He's the heir. You're not. Don't you want a little revenge?"
  • 99. "Hey, Xander's not my favorite person ever, but he's still my brother. He's fun to pick on, and I can't do that if he's dead."
  • 100. "You're the one with the Vetinari Nice Point. You're the one with the ruthlessness. You deserve to be the heir. You got passed over for your birthright. It's only fair to make others suffer for it."
  • 101. "Don't be an idiot. This way, I don't have to die. I can WooHoo SimSelves until this whole thing's over. I'll take eternal life, thanks. And I'm betting you feel the same way, or you'd have been dust ages ago."
  • 102. "You don't have to take over and die. You just have to hurt them. In fact, it's better if you don't take over. The Dualegacy destroyed as easily as the right death at the right time. A win for our team." "That's your gig, not mine, you psycho. Xander's cool with being heir, I'm cool with not being heir, why mess with it?"
  • 103. "Look, I could use someone like you on my side. You're mean, clever, and utterly nasty."
  • 104. "What do you say? Have another drink and join me."
  • 105. "No. What's in it for me? Sounds like a whole lotta not-fun and a whole lotta not-WooHoo, and a whole lotta killing my brother whom I can't torment if he's dead. So, no. Thanks for the offer, but I'm outta here. Don't contact me again. Maybe I don't want Xander dead, but you, I could take or leave."
  • 106. "You should have taken that second drink, boy."
  • 108. "Because it contained the antidote to the poison I put in the first one."
  • 109. "You said you weren't going to kill me!"
  • 110. "You should have opened your ears. I said if I wanted you dead, you'd know. And now you do."
  • 112. "Someone like you is either with me or against me. You made your choice. I hope it was worth it."
  • 113.
  • 114.
  • 115. "Hurry it up, would you? I haven't got all day."
  • 116. "Hey, Dad, the kitchen's clean. Uh..."
  • 117. "...Why is there a dead person on the floor?"
  • 118. "He chose poorly. Do you have a problem with that?"
  • 119. "No. But I'm pretty sure this is a health code violation." ...Archie... ...Coco... I knew you. I liked you. And I couldn't stop Dad from killing your son. I'm so sorry.
  • 120. "Grab that, would you? We have a little errand to run."
  • 121. "Perfect. Just perfect." "We should go, Dad. If someone catches us here, things could get hairy." "What are they going to do? Make annoyed faces at us?" "The smart thing to do is not stick around to gloat." "Oh, all right. We've done what we came here to do."
  • 122. "Xander? There's something on the lawn. Will you go see what it is?"
  • 124. "Xander, what is it?" "Mom..." "Is that... Is that Archie?" "I don't know how it happened."
  • 125. "How could he have died? He was supposed to live forever!" "Mom, it'll be okay. We'll figure it out."
  • 126. "Dad? What's going on? Why's Grandma crying?" "Go back inside, boys. Go make Tess and Fair breakfast. Both of you." "But, Dad--" "Now, boys."
  • 127. "Call your father. If Archie's dead, things have changed. I think it's time we had a talk." "It can wait, Mom." "I don't think it can. Too much is at stake." "It can wait a little longer." "I shouldn't have had to bury my son."