We all know exactly what childbirth is ... right? Well not really. Obviously childbirth is giving birth to a child but that's like saying 'love' is one thing or there is only one type of snow. In fact we really don't understand childbirth at all. It's something that happens to us more often than not. Giving birth is one of those infrequent and monumental life experiences so you'd think all mothers-to-be and fathers-to-be would take a serious look at the skills they need to know so they can 'do' this infrequent and monumental experience! But a skills-based approach to childbirth isn't inside anyone's mind. The focus around childbirth is all about gathering information, making choices and giving informed consent as this 'happens' to us. But that's half of the thinking. We have to have the skills to 'do' our birth experience. We all need to wake up because the lack of birth and coaching skills means that the shame, blame, guilt and disappointment is being experienced by too, too many mothers and fathers. So let's think this through. Won't you like to learn the skills that other fathers/mothers have used? How about developed? That's what Birthing Better with The Pink Kit Method® is ... skills developed by hundreds and hundreds of ordinary families who used these skills in every type of birth. What did families want: 1) To have as safe a birth as possible for both the mother and baby. 2) To face the unknown with as much confidence as possible. 3) To stay on top of and in control of their baby's birth even if they have no control except the skills they use. 4) To look back on their baby's birth with pride, dignity and sense of self-empowerment as possible. Making choices didn't address those four elements. Choices aren't always available and too frequently change. Birth Plans don't often unfold. You don't know what your birth will be like but it will unfold. Having skills not only addresses those four elements but they work in every type of birth. Giving birth takes place over Time and skills fill that time. Become a skilled birthing family.

2. What is Childbirth?
Childbirth comes after a successful conception.
Childbirth could either be
• Vaginal birth or
• Caesarean
Miscarriage, stillborn, or premature birth, are all considered childbirth.
You will do your best to have a
safe birth experience.
Childbirth is the natural transformation out of the state of pregnancy that you will take
along with your partner, extended family, and friends.
Seek answers to these questions
• What is childbirth, really?
• What is your task while giving birth?
• What are your roles for this task?
• How do you best prepare for your task?
• Do you have the rights skills for this task?
• When and how will you use these skills while doing this task?

3. What It’s not?
Common
Misperceptions
• Only women give birth, automatically, intuitively,
or instinctively know how to give birth.
• If a woman moans, groans, cries, screams, or
curses, it is natural for her to do so.
WRONG! These behaviours indicate that she does
not know how to cope with the experience.
• If a woman is quiet during labour, means she
likes the experience or feels she is doing well.
WRONG! She might hate it, feeling totally out of
control, and showing that by shutting down.

4. What It’s not?
Common
Misperceptions
• Women either have to suffer in labour, or those
women who don’t suffer are “lucky” or somehow
“trust birth.”
• For women who have trouble coping with labour
pain, the best and only answer to her “suffering”
is to either put her out of her misery with
medicine or assume she is incapable of giving
birth.
• Easy, lucky, or intuitive birth cannot be replicated
by the same woman or other women. Therefore
childbirth can’t be taught.
• There is no way for a man to really help.
This is entirely false!

5. “I’m having a baby.”
- To experience, or undergo something; to engage or
participate in something.
- A child is born, but beyond that, everything just gets
convoluted.
Pink Kit Skills
- Will help to deal with difficulties during childbirth
“If you can’t change the
circumstances, change your attitude.”
• no “right” birth
• Don’t be lackadaisical and depend on others –
midwives, OBs, or nurses.
• Birth Plan is the big picture and it could change
• Make birth preparation a priority
Have: An Unclear Term

6. • Most women have no clue
• Stresses out, can’t cope with pain and feels out of
control
• She needs help
• She needs her partner to be there
• Birth skills can help cope better with natural pain of
labour and can work with baby’s effort to come
down out of her body
• Knowledge will help her confidence increase
• If the partner learns coaching skills, he will know
exactly when and how to help
• In modern maternity systems, assessments,
monitoring, and procedures will be done
Your Birthing Better Pink Kit skills work well
alongside the healthcare you receive
Birth skills lead to positive birth perceptions
and experiences.
The Truth about Birth

7. • Natural birth (“No one told me how to birth;
I just did it”),
• A woman’s ability to instinctively know how
to give birth (“You’ll know what to do on the
day”),
• Letting the primal brain take over and not
using your more complex brain (“Cats aren’t
taught how to birth; we don’t need to be”
or “You breathe all the time, so you’ll keep
doing it during labour”), and
• Not telling a woman what to do during
childbirth (“Mother knows best”).
Childbirth Intuition/
Instinct Or Skills

8. All humans have a neo-cortical part of their
brain, for more complex “thinking, perceiving,
and choosing” aspects.
• Natural reaction to pain is “tense”
• Learning to “let go” during labour pain is
counter-instinctive and counter-intuitive
• Will power, and determination to let go
are choices made by our neo-cortex
Skills enhance our intuition
and instincts.
Childbirth Intuition/
Instinct Or Skills

9. Childbirth as Skills
• Skills lead to educated Reponses
• It is an Activity, one of Life’s Biggest Event
• An experience
• Then childbirth is a process: “a series of
natural occurrences that produce change or
development” (Encarta Dictionary)
Three type of birth plus 1
1. Labour and then a vaginal delivery.
2. Labour and then an emergency Caesarean.
3. A non-laboring, planned Caesarean.
4. Vaginal Delivery after a previous Caesarean.

10. Childbirth as Skills
Pink Kit Resources
Facilitate a #1-style birth
• If necessary, move from labor into a #2-style,
surgical birth, still using your skills.
• Enjoy a #3-style birth by preparing for it in the
same way as other women and being able to use
skills on your way to the hospital, while being
prepped, and during surgery and recovery.
• Increase your chances of accomplishing a #4-
style VBAC, yet know that you will still be able to
remain engaged via your skills if you have another
Caesarean.

11. Why Skills are Important?
• Empowered childbirth, use the mind to consciously work
with the body so that the body can help the baby come
out
• Knowledge and learning the skills will draw the couple
close together and will work to achieve a positive and
safe birth experience.
Passivity Leads to a Disconnect
In non-laboring Caesarean, couples don’t make any
preparation.
• The mind in labor is very active
• Senses are sharpened
• Awareness is heightened
Negative Voice inside “I can’t, it’s too painful! ,‛
Oh no, another contraction! ‚ I can’t bear this! ‚ Don’t touch‛ ‛
me! ‚ I don’t like that person…‛

12. Why skills are Important?
Management Voice inside:
• I have to relax as I exhale.‛
• I have to soften inside my sacrum.‛
• Open, open, open… I can do this!‛ ‛
• After this contractions over, I’ve got to relax more.‛
• I don’t like this, but I know I’m handling it well.‛
Your Management Voice leads you to positive birthing
behaviours. Your Negative Voice can lead to many
stressful or negative behaviours.
Yes, your birth skills may prevent some “problems”
that come from overreacting to the pain of childbirth,
but more importantly, your skills are there to help you
really cope, handle, and manage the natural occurring
pain that comes from letting a big object out of your
body without “suffering.”

13. Childbirth
It is physical. At, present Pregnancy is
• not associated with learning birthing and coaching skills
On any type of birth (Caesarean, elective Caesarean,
vaginal birth)
• Reduce, prevent, and/or eliminate potential risks to
yourself and your baby. Reduce potential medical
interventions.
• focus more on what you are doing and on your
relationship to your baby than on what is happening to
you.
Emergency Caesarean because our baby was not
responding well to labor, while waiting to get the
operating theater ready, we would still use the Directed
Breathing, Pelvic Clock, and Touch Relaxation. Even during
the post-operative pain.

14. A whole New Approach
• develop a clear awareness of the subtle
distinction between “feeling intense
pain/discomfort” and “being adversely
affected.”
• It’s not up to your obstetrician or your
midwife or other parents to argue about
how you should handle your birth. You are
the one doing this activity, and the power to
do it in a new, better way lies in your hands.
• Childbirth is full of the unexpected, and it
makes sense for you to plan for the worst
• Birthing Better with The Pink Kit Method®
aims to exponentially increase the number
of fathers/others who are wonderful birth
coaches/supports/helpers/assistants.

15. Birthing Better Pink Kit
Produced by Common Knowledge Trust
www.thepinkkit.com