1. Why you should let me touch your boobs.®
Ass, face, and etc.
Company Advertising Brochure
A subsidiary of LW Corporations®

2. Qualifications
Certified Female Body Inspector (FBI)
~8 years (PhD) of experience
YONEX® POWER CUSHION Technology
YONEX® Enhanced Wrist Power [1]

3. Qualifications cont
I support all breast cup sizes.
A Cup B Cup C Cup
….
D Cup E Cup F Cup

4. Pros
• 100% cheaper than a therapeutic massage
• I might find that you have breast cancer and save
your life (doctors are expensive)
• They look kind of lonely, bras can’t massage
• Releases oxytocin (love hormone) that you will like
• My hands are soft as SILK [2]

5. Cons
• You might bug me for more after your trial period
• You might not want to leave (3)
• You might feel too good
• N/A
• N/A
• N/A
• N/A
• N/A
• I think I forgot to mention you’d want more
• I shall remind you that you’d want more
• Why do I keep forgetting to tell you you’d want more
• Just remember you’d want more

6. Research Analysis
0 min.– Trial offer beings
2 min.– Spidey senses tingling
4 min.– CENSORED (No data)
6 min.– CENSORED (No data)
8 min.– CENSORED (No data)
Your Happiness
10 min.– You have reached the
climax of your mountain
(Trial offer ends)
10 - 12 min. – Subscribers only
>12 min. – You have to leave to
avoid addiction (4)
Time (mins)

7. Why consult our services?
Highest Rated Customer Rating 100 years in a row
Data from www.totallynotbiasedreviews.com/LWCorp
“... …Yes…MORE…OH YESS!!!!!”
yes
-Silvie Li
…it speaks for itself

8. Our Company In the News

9. RECAP
Why say yes? Why say no?
• Free •
• High Quality Services •
• Highly Qualified Employees •
• Who can say no to this deal? •
•
•
It speaks for itself
See? I even spent 6 years of my
life preparing this 3D graph just for
you.

10. NOTES
[1] (Explanation) YONEX is a badminton brand and playing
badminton increases wrist power…
[2] “Soft as silk” to an extent.
[3] If “you might not want to leave,” you can stay if I don’t
have school the following day.
[4] Extremely addictive after 12 min. session, 1000 times
more than nicotine (without the disadvantages of
overconsumption).