Parent seminar student guide -part 2--the school years--rev 1

Hand in Hand for Education
How Parents Help Children Succeed in School
Part 2
Parent Guide,
Workbook, and
Seminar Journal

These “teaching panels” summarize the content of Part 2 of the online seminar (accessible at
www.parentingforschoolsuccess.org ). To go to a particular section, launch “Slide Show” and click
on the appropriate section summary panel below.
Hand in Hand for Education—
Content Summary for Part 2. The School Years
Part 2 Overview Parent-Teacher Partnership The Home Environment
Elementary School Middle School High School
College

Part 2. The School Years . . .
Key factors in your child’s school success are
parental guidance and support at home and
working in partnership with teachers and schools.
In this section we will explore how to:
 Work in partnership with teachers and schools. This is an important part of your
responsibility for your child’s education.
 Provide support and guidance in the home during each phase of your children’s
education by applying the parenting practices you have already learned in ways that
will help your children succeed in school.
 Help your children successfully handle changes and transitions as they enter
Kindergarten and move on to Elementary School, Middle School, High School, and
College.
 Monitor your child’s progress, know what to expect at each grade level, and work with
teachers to assure success.
 Plan and prepare for post-high school education whether at a college or university or
in a specialized training program.
Back to Part 2 Summary To Next Section Summary

Your children will learn to
value education and
learning by what you say
and do.
It is your values and
expectations that will
have the greatest
influence on how your
children feel about
school.
PARENTS
are the
most important
teachers a child will
ever have.
Education and learning are linked
to everything that happens in
the home and family.
Your children have been learning
by watching you, talking to you, and
interacting with you.
After watching the following video, use the
worksheet on the next page to record your thoughts
and ideas about what you want to teach your children

Think About It!
• What are three important things that you learned from your parents?
• What are three important things that your children are learning from you now?
• When it comes to education and preparing for the future, what are the values and
expectations you want to impart? And, what are some ways you might go about
communicating them?

Lesson 1
Parents and
Teachers Working
Together

Children Learn Best When Parents and Teachers Work Together-----
This section will provide you with the tools you need
to develop a good working partnership with your child’s teacher.
Talk with your
child about
school, and if you
have concerns or
questions, contact
the teacher.
Volunteer, attend
parent-teacher
conferences and
other school
events
Meet your child’s
teacher at the
beginning of the
school year—
develop good
communication
Three key areas are:

Developing a Positive Working
Relationship with Your Child’s Teacher
Meeting the teacher at the beginning of the school year
lays the foundation for a good working relationship.
Keep an open mind when talking with teachers.
Try to appreciate their point of view.
Checking in with the teacher on a regular basis ensures
that any difficulties your child is experiencing can be
addressed before they become big problems.
Find out why a good parent-teacher relation-
ship is so important to you and your child —
Don’t hesitate to contact a teacher when you don’t understand something
that your child is learning or when you have a question.
Use the following worksheet to make notes about
these presentations and to record your ideas.

Notes and Ideas:
Developing a Good Parent-Teacher Partnership
• How will my relationship with my child’s teacher help
my child?
• When I meet my child’s teacher at the beginning of the school year:
–What do I want to learn?
--What do I want him/her to know about my child (and about me)?
• What is the best way for me to communicate with the teacher?
--When is the best time ?
• Do I have any questions or concerns I would like to discuss with the teacher right now?

Help-sheet for first meeting the teacher -
Remember this is just a short informal meeting so it helps to think about it ahead of time. Here
are “7 Things “ that it would be helpful for a teacher to know about your child.. Choose the most
important things the teacher should know right now for the first meeting, then speak with the
teacher at another time about other items.
• Things we would like to share with the
teacher about our child:
• Questions we want to ask the teacher:

Communicating with the school
--some guidelines about who to talk to
• School_____________________________
• Office phone #______________________
• School website______________________
• E-mail_____________________________
• Child______________________________
• Teacher____________________________
• Phone#____________________________
• E-mail_____________________________
• Child______________________________
• Teacher____________________________
• Phone#____________________________
• E-mail_____________________________
• Child______________________________
• Teacher____________________________
• Phone#____________________________
• E-mail_____________________________
Notes:
In slide-show mode,
click on the blue link.

How You Can Be Involved in School
--and Why it is so important!
Daily and Weekly Activities
Special Projects and Events
There are many ways to be involved in school that do not require
showing up in the classroom each week. Attending special events as
a family (performances, sports events, or service projects) will help
you and your child get to know other families and feel part of the
school community. When kids feel like they “belong” at school, this
has a positive effect on their performance.
Making the Most of Teacher Meetings
Talking with a Teacher about Problems
--how to stay positive & productive
The In’s and Out’s of Volunteering (also in Spanish)
Involvement for Working Parents
Effective Volunteering from Elementary through High School
Attend Parent-Teacher Conferences
Tips on How to Prepare for a Parent/Teacher Conference
--Great helps on asking questions & following up
--Four “B’s” that make Parent/Teacher meetings successful
Keep a notepad handy to jot
down ideas from these resources

Notes on successful parent-teacher conferences
and other ways to be involved in school
Think about it!
• What skills, talents, or experiences could you share to enrich what your child is learning in school?

Teacher’s Name: _______________________________
Appointment date & time: ___________________
Room Number: __________
Worksheet for Parent-Teacher Conferences
Questions:
1.
2.
3.
Be supportive:
some things you appreciate—
 -
 -
 -
Teachers Remarks
What things are going well:
Changes/Improvements:
 What you can do to help:
 Procedure for tracking progress and staying in touch with teacher
How he/she describes your child:

The Value of Conversations about School
Talking about school with your children lets them know you care
about them and what is happening in their lives and that you value education
As important as conversations about school are, it is not always easy to get your child to share the
experiences of the day and how he feels about them. Here are some websites that can help.
Conversations about School
• http://www.schoolfamily.com/school-family-articles/article/733-have-a-conversation-about-school
Questions to Jumpstart Conversations about School
• http://www.schoolfamily.com/school-family-articles/article/853-20-questions-to-ask-your-child
• http://www.scholastic.com/resources/article/10-questions-to-ask-your-child-about-his-day-at-scho/
• For Young Children: http://shine.yahoo.com/moments-of-motherhood/10-questions-to-ask-your-child-about-
his-day-at-school-2409031.html
What Question Did You Ask in School Today?
• http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/social-skills/6994-asking-questions-video.gs?cpn=20120826weeklysend
Note: This material is also found in the following section:
The Home Environment Continues to Matter--Support and Praise.
You may wish to read some of these articles now and some when studying that section.
Use the following worksheet to record notes.

• When are the best times to talk with your child (children)? The worst times?
• Which questions or techniques that you have read about do you think will be most effective with your
children?
• Will the same questions and conversation techniques work well with each child? What different
approaches might you want to try?
Think about it: Communicating with your child about school

Goals and Plans for being involved
and partnering with the teacher/school
Goals: (what?)
_____________________
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Plans: (how?)
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Notes on how you are
doing—successes and
things to do differently
______________________
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______________________Back to Part 2 Summary Back to Section Summary

Lesson 2
Six Home Factors
that Affect
School Success

The Home Environment Continues to Matter
In this lesson, each item below will be explored in detail.
Home
Factors
That Affect
School
Success
Expec-
tations
Structure/
Routine
Home
Learning
Support/
Praise
Relation-
ships
Modeling
Whether your children are in kindergarten or high school,
these six factors will be important in helping them learn.

EXPECTATIONS
 Children learn better when parents
and children work together to
develop clear and reasonable
expectations.
 Explain why school is important. Talk
with your children about specific
ways it will effect their future. Even
when children are young, talk about
going to college
 Look ahead. At the beginning of each
school term, talk to your child about
what the teacher expects and what
your child needs to do to meet those
expectations.
 Expectations should be realistic but
challenging. Children need to
understand what will happen if they do
not meet expectations and what will
happen if they do.
Because expectations are an expression of our values, as parents we try to establish
expectations and consequences that guide our children to make good choices and
behave well. Keep in mind the guidelines below, as you complete the assignments
on the following pages.

(video)
 While watching the video “Expect a Lot of Your Children” a guide to establishing expectations
listen for the answers to the following questions and make notes in your journal
 What are expectations? What are they based upon?
 How do expectations influence your children?
 What steps lead to establishing effective expectations?
 When it comes to consequences, what are two mistakes that you need to avoid?
 What are the characteristics of meaningful consequences?
 What does inconsistency in applying consequences communicate to your children?
 Take time to identify what your expectations for your child’s school behavior and achievement are. Write them down but
keep an open mind. Also, find out what the teacher’s expectations are.
 Using the questions in the discussion guide (next page), gather together as a family or with each child individually and talk
about what would be challenging but realistic expectations in your family. Everyone should listen respectfully as well as
have a chance to talk.
 Once you have developed a set of expectations and consequences, write them on a paper or make a chart to display in a
place where it will be seen often.
Use the journal page “Expectations and Consequences for Our Family” or create your own chart or poster
Look for other videos on the importance of expectations in Parent Seminar Enrichment Resources.
Assignment: Establishing Effective Expectations and Consequences

Expectations: A discussion guide for you and your child
• As parents, what do you think would be realistic but challenging expectations for behavior and
achievement at school for your child?
• What are the teacher’ expectations?
• What does your child think?
• What does your child need to do to meet these expectations?
• How can you support your child in meeting the teacher’s expectations and your expectations? Talk about
these ideas together
• What consequences—both negative and positive—should be related to the se expectations.
Be specific! Write them down!
• When you have decided what the expectations and consequences are,
work together to make a chart that you can post where it will be seen often.

Expectations and Consequences
for Our Family
Expectations
_____________________
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Positive Consequences
_________________________
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Negative Consequences
______________________
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______________________Back to Section Summary

STRUCTURE & ROUTINE
 Think about a typical day in your family’s life. Do things run smoothly,
with a minimum amount of frustration, stress and conflict? Or, are there
certain tasks—such as getting off to work and school in the morning,
getting homework done, getting dinner on the table, getting children to
bed—that are often chaotic? If your answer is “Yes” to this last question
then creating more structure and routine may help.
 Before looking at the suggestions and resources
in this section, take a few minutes to identify
problem areas in your home organization and
family routines and write them down.
1.___________________________________________
2.___________________________________________
3.___________________________________________
4.___________________________________________
5.___________________________________________
 Benefits of routines and schedules:
1. Help kids know what to expect.
2. Eliminate power struggles
3. Help kids cooperate
4. Enable them to take charge of themselves.
5. Help parents maintain consistency in
expectations
6. Help kids get on a schedule for sleeping, meals,
etc.
To learn more go to:
http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/family-
life/structure-routines

STRUCTURE & ROUTINE
Children feel secure when they know what to
expect and what is expected of them.
Mealtimes:
 A nutritious breakfast = better concentration in school
 Eat at least one meal a day together!
Bedtime:
 Establish a time to go to bed
that allows adequate sleep
 Have a regular bedtime routine
Establish routines and rules together:
 Include mealtimes, times for chores, homework, reading, “screen
time”--TV, video games, computers, socializing with friends, family
 Know where your children are, who they are with, what they are
doing, and how they are getting to and from activities.
Create an organization center:
 Put up a large family calendar to keep track of
everyone’s schedules and activities
 Post school schedules and class schedules for each child
 Post reminders of due dates for long-term assignments
 Have a list of important phone numbers easily available
 Have a message board where family members can leave
quick notes for each other.

Organization Resources to Explore
Family Organization
 Ten Reasons Why Planning Works for Me—
http://www.printfriendly.com/print/v2?url=http://planningwithkids.com/2009/09/15/10-
reasons-why-planning-works-for-me/
 Top Ten Family Organization Tips—plus links to other articles
http://www.scjohnson.com/en/family/family-economics/post.aspx?date=11-01-19&title=Top-10-
Family-Organization-Tips
 Back to School Time-Savers for Busy Moms
http://www.5min.com/Video/Back-to-School-Time-Savers-for-Busy-Moms-397184194
 Helping Children Learn to Organize
http://www.5min.com/Video/Teach-Kids-to-Organize-278595428
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Reduce-Clutter-in-Kids-Room-517216954
Time Management
http://www.5min.com/Video/Using-Time-to-Your-Advantage-155908711
Managing “Screen Time”
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Get-Your-Kids-to-Turn-Off-Electronics-and-Spend-Some-
Family-Time-517095375
http://www.greatschools.org/students/media-kids/4229-helping-your-child-break-the-video-
game-addiction-video.gs?cpn=20120729weeklysend

Establishing Effective
Family Routines
Goals
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Plans
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Outcome s
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• Involving all family members in the goal/planning stages usually encourages cooperation and support.
• But change isn’t easy and may not happen as quickly as you would like.
• Have a family council to talk about how things are going. If necessary revise your plans and try new ways to achieve your goals.
• Consistency and patience are important when trying to develop new ways of doing things and setting new expectations.
Back to Section Summary

LEARNING
Organizing & monitoring
HOMEWORK is one of
the critical ways parents
support their children’s
learning. See the next
page for suggestions
and resources.
Encourage children to
think of school and
learning as their job.
FAMILY ACTIVITIES like
working, talking, playing
games, reading, sharing
meals, and socializing
with family and friends
are important to
academic, social and
emotional development.
See the following pages
for idea resources
MAKE SUMMER COUNT
and avoid the
“backslide” that can
take place between
school years by planning
activities of your own
and using resources in
the community for
enrichment and
reinforcement activities.
Positive and constructive experiences
outside of school promote learning in school.

Learning: Homework Basics
Ten Ways to Help Kids with Homework
1. Help children get organized and develop good habits by writing down the homework assignment in an assignment or agenda pad each day. They should
bring this pad to and from school each day and refer to it when they sit down to tackle their homework. Parents should also review the assignment pad nightly
to see that all homework is completed.
2. Provide children with a calendar to chart long term assignments and any other activities that may interfere with completing nightly homework.
3. Parents should look over previous night’s homework to see if their child is on the right track and meeting the teacher’s expectations.
4. Assume that children have homework every night. Even if nothing is written in the assignment pad and the child claims that there is no homework, they
should still spend some time reviewing class notes, studying for upcoming quizzes or tests, or working on practice problems dealing with concepts that they
may have struggled with in the past.
5. Children should attempt homework on their own before eliciting the help of a parent or a tutor. Struggling for a little while with a concept is not a bad thing
and will help a student realize that not everything will come easy and most things can be figured out if they put a little thought and effort into it. However,
don’t let children get too frustrated. Parents should step in before their kids become discouraged.
6. If children have attempted the homework on their own and are struggling quite a bit, then sit down with them and work out the beginning of the
homework together and then let them try the rest.
7. Do not do homework for the child. Ask leading questions and prompt them in the direction of the answer, but don’t give away the answers. If children know
that eventually Mom or Dad will do their homework for them, then they will always pretend to struggle until someone does it for them.
8. Praise works wonders. Identify what the children are doing well and let them know that you noticed.
9. Parents should stay in touch with their children's teachers. A simple e-mail every once in a while will keep the lines of communication open and elicit
feedback about how the children are performing at home and in the classroom.
10. Parents should show their children that even adults have homework. By sitting down to pay the bills, balance a checkbook, write thank you notes or a
letter to a friend, look up recipes, or simply read for pleasure, it will help kids understand that the skills they are learning in school now will be applied in
their adult life. (from Tutorfi.com)

Learning Links
Guidelines for Organizing and Monitoring Homework
 http://www.5min.com/Video/Stress-Free-Homework-Habits-517204577
 http://www.5min.com/Video/Monitoring-Homework-as-a-Working-Parent-517231037
 http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Get-Organized-for-School-517289061
 http://www.5min.com/Video/Motivating-Your-Child-Student-with-Praise-517204581
Additional suggestions and help with specific homework challenges can be accessed from the Elementary School
Years section
Home and Family
 All-round great website for parents and kids
http://www.pbs.org/parents/
 Talking and Listening to Children
http://www.pbs.org/parents/talkingwithkids/strategies.html
 In your own backyard—exploring nature at home
http://bcove.me/i42hcilz
Community and Recreation Activities
http://life.familyeducation.com/slideshow/activities/57572.html
http://www.ehow.com/way_5312938_fun-inexpensive-places-children.html

Supporting learning in the home and family—
What are your successes and challenges?
Homework:
Successes:
Challenges:
Possible solutions:
Home and Family:
Successes:
Challenges:
Possible solutions:
It’s important to take time to notice all the good things that you are doing to support
your child’s learning and feel a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction—Hooray for
you!
Yes, you may see areas that could be improved. However, start with small changes—
sometimes they produce the biggest rewards over time. Having dinner together more
often, one on one time with a child playing their favorite game or going for a walk,
made-up stories as you tuck them in bed, looking at old family or vacation pictures, are
times that encourage curiosity, language skills, social skills, etc.
See the elementary and
middle school sections for more
homework - study skills resources.

Making Summer Count
The Unwanted Back-slide
Over the summer, students can lose 1-2 months of progress in reading and math
Unless they are engaged in activities that---
• Reinforce what they have learned during the school year
• Enrich knowledge and skills, encourage curiosity and exploration,
and build competence and confidence.
Reinforcing activities:
• Reading daily can help students at all levels
maintain and even increase their vocabulary
and comprehension skills.
• Math and science review and mastery can be worked into a
variety of activities. Check out the listed websites for ideas.
• Take summer school classes for language development or to gain
mastery in a core subject

Making Summertime Count
Enriching activities:
• Schools may offer classes in subjects
that a students can’t fit into their
regular schedule
• Community recreation departments offer a
variety of day camps, lessons, and community
events & entertainment.
• Family outings can be inexpensive, fun and educational.
Enjoying nature, community events, libraries, museums,
and factory tours—check what is available in your area.
• Family projects might include service projects, family history,
home improvement, learning a skill together

Check out these websites for ways to
make the most of summer vacation!
Preventing summer learning loss
http://childparenting.about.com/od/schoollearning/tp/prevent_summer_learning_loss.htm
http://www.5min.com/Video/Tips-to-Beat-the-Summer-Learning-Slide-517408005
http://mvguam.com/helping-your-child-succeed/24077-eight-simple-ways-to-prevent-the-
summer-slide.html
Ideas for Summer Learning Fun
http://www.5min.com/Video/Creative-Summer-Games-for-Children-308965642
http://www.5min.com/Video/Affordable-Summer-Activities-For-Kids-517124459
http://www.education.com/magazine/article/how-to-weave-math-learning-into-summer-fun/
http://www.education.com/magazine/article/diy-camping
http://mvguam.com/helping-your-child-succeed/24315-10-ideas-to-keep-kids-reading-this-
summer.html
Some Advice on Use of Technology During the Summer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=w5bJ2DrJRsk

Worksheet: Getting Organized for Summer
Summer break has become shorter and shorter!
Summer fun (and learning) requires some planning ahead
Think about how you might incorporate some of these activities and others into your summer:
--Do remedial work in math or reading? (try to make it fun)
--Make reading a part of each day
--Help kids explore special interests
--Organize a family project
--Visit places and people that are important to you
--Include regular outdoor and physical activities
--Take advantage of Parks and Recreation or other free or low-cost summer programs (sign-up
usually starts in the spring)

Back-to-school Checklist:
Summer is over before you know it!
 Before school starts, visit the school and
the child’s classroom.
 Attend any meetings or back-to-school
nights
 Establish a positive working relationship
with your child’s teacher.
 Make sure your child has any supplies that
you must provide. This can be an
expensive time. Let your child come with
you to the store and pick out one or two
special things. Then do the rest of the
shopping by yourself so you can choose
more basic supplies. Often summer
clothes are just fine for the beginning of
school. Unless your child needs new
clothes wait until later.
 Review the 6 basic home factors and
determine how you can best support your
child’s school success this year.
 Think about “lessons learned” from last
year. How might you do things differently
this year? What are your hopes and
expectations for this school year?
To make a smooth transition back to
school browse these web sites:
• How to prepare for the beginning of the
school year
http://www.colorincolorado.org/article
/26517/ (English)
http://www.colorincolorado.org/articul
o/26523/ (Spanish)
• Tips for having a great first day at
school
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5
OAGndNNec&feature=channel&list=UL
Use your journal to make notes and record goals
and plans for the new school year.

SUPPORT AND PRAISE
Regular support + praise
 greater self-confidence
 better results in school
Appreciate and accept your children as individuals
• Be aware of their strengths and weaknesses.
• Praise them every day. Effective praise recognizes the child’s effort, not just
success. It is immediate and focuses on the task.
• Pay attention to what they are doing and learning in school.
• Talk to them about school work and activities. Ask questions.
• Look at their homework, their school books, papers they bring home.
Get to know your child’s teacher
• Find out what he/she thinks your child’s strengths and weaknesses are.
Share your ideas.
• Ask what you can do to reinforce what is being taught at school.
• Focus on solutions when there is a problem. Let the teacher know you are
concerned, and work with your child and the teacher to find a solution.
Learn More

“ Having a healthy self-esteem is a major key to academic and social success in school
and in life…. research shows that a positive self-concept is more important to academic
success than a high IQ.”
Here are some helpful resources for building your child’s confidence and self-esteem:
Two Great Articles:
Help your child increase in confidence
http://mvguam.com/helping-your-child-succeed/22720-help-your-
children-increase-their-confidence.html
Help your child develop healthy self-esteem
http://mvguam.com/helping-your-child-succeed/21901-help-your-child-
develop-healthy-self-esteem.html
Excellent Videos:
Importance and Benefits of High Self-esteem
http://www.5min.com/Video/Parenting-Building-Self-Esteem-in-Children-517131144
Building Blocks of Self Esteem
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-BDQa_L2oA&feature=relmfu
How to Praise Children Effectively
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=dWG7-GK6-EE&NR=1
Building confidence and Self-esteem
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Build-a-Childs-Self-Esteem-253704279
Building Self-confidence through solving problems
http://www.5min.com/Video/Parenting-Building-Confidence-in-Children-517110164
Teach Children Problem Solving Skills
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=jj56WysTTMk&NR=1
Three Pillars of Successful Achievers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=AZAhrK_EdMQ&NR=1

The Importance of Talking with Your Child
Click on the blue link above to learn how frequent, friendly conversations with your child
help them develop communication skills (speaking and listening) that are so important to
their school success.
As you read the article, keep these questions in mind:
1. How will good communication skills help my child in the classroom?
2. What should my child and I talk about?
3. What are the characteristics of a good conversation with my child?
4. Why is it important to listen and respond to what my child is saying?
5. How would you describe a “balanced” conversation?
6. What are some of the “rules” of social conversation?
7. Which of these “rules” would it help to work on in our family?

The Value of Conversations about School
This material was first presented in the section, “Developing Parent-Teacher Partnerships and Working with
the School” Quickly review the articles and your responses to the “Think About It! questions. Add additional
ideas and thoughts to your journal notes.
As important as conversations about school are, it is not always easy to get your child to share the
experiences of the day and how he feels about them. Here are some Web sites that can be helpful:
Conversations about School
• http://www.schoolfamily.com/school-family-articles/article/733-have-a-conversation-about-school
Questions to Jumpstart Conversations about School
• http://www.schoolfamily.com/school-family-articles/article/853-20-questions-to-ask-your-child
• http://www.scholastic.com/resources/article/10-questions-to-ask-your-child-about-his-day-at-
scho/
• For young children: http://shine.yahoo.com/moments-of-motherhood/10-questions-to-ask-
your-child-about-his-day-at-school-2409031.ht_m
What question did you ask in school today?
http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/social-skills/6994-asking-questions-
video.gs?cpn=20120826weeklysend
Think about it!
• Which questions or techniques that you have read about do you think will be most effective with your children?
• Will the same questions and conversation techniques work with each of your children?

RELATIONSHIPS—
At Home:
Express love and acceptance . Regularly show affection and tell them
that they are loveable and capable. Let them know mistakes are part of
the learning process. Review “Help Your Child Build Healthy Self-Esteem”
in Structure and Praise Section.
Catch your child being/doing good. Reinforce good behavior. Make a
big deal out of it. If discipline is necessary, carry it out with love and
respect. Children should feel safe from physical and verbal abuse.
Have conversations with your children often. Encourage them to think
about and express their emotions. For example, “How do you feel about
your new class or activity?” Listen carefully to their responses. Also see
“The Importance of Talking to Your Child” in Structure and Praise Section.
(Follow the links above for more information)
Children do best in all areas of their lives when they
have a warm, caring, and encouraging environment
at home and in school

RELATIONSHIPS AT SCHOOL Children do best
in all areas of
their lives when
they have a
warm, caring &
safe environment
at home and
in school
The school climate should:
• Encourage respect, curiosity, and creativity
• Focus on the success of all children
• Protect them from physical and
emotional bullying
• Celebrate diversity
Support your children in their
social relationships and when concerns arise.
--Help them develop social skills
--Help them resolve conflicts and find peaceful
solutions to problems.
--If your child is wrong help him understand what was
wrong and how to change the behavior.
--Work with teachers to bring about positive changes in
the child’s behavior.

Positive Social and Emotional Relationships Help Children Succeed Academically
• Research shows that developing social and emotional skills
improves academic performance and prevents problem behavior.
• Developing these skills helps kids
• Communicate well.
• Team up effectively with others.
• Manage emotions like anger
and discouragement.
• Learn how to cope with the everyday
difficulties of life.
Resources for Dealing with Difficult Situations
(Developing conflict resolution skills and resiliency)
Teach Kids to Resolve Conflicts Well (Click on titles)
What Can I Do to Help My Child or Teenager Solve Problems?
Helping Children Resolve Conflicts
Building a Child’s Resiliency
Ten Pillars of Emotional Resilence
Resources for Helping Your Child Develop Social Skills
All Children Want to Belong
Helping Children Make Friends
Social Intelligence for Elementary Schoolers
Helping Your Child Deal With Social Issues
The following two journal pages provide guidelines for
applying the information found in these resources

Are there social skills that your child needs to develop or strengthen?
1. Write down the one that you think is the most important to work on?
2. Think about ways to work on this particular issue.
3. Prayerfully decide what to do and how to talk with your child about this issue.
4. Make a plan and begin carrying it out. If this involves relationships at school, let your child’s
teacher know what you are doing so that he/she can help and give you feedback as he/she
observes you child
5. Recognize and praise even small improvements.
6. Each week evaluate the progress that is made. Review your plan and revise if necessary.
Relationships Worksheet: Helping your child develop social skills

Relationships Worksheet II: Resolving problems and conflicts
Do the same problems and conflicts come up over and over?
1. After writing down one of these problems, try to identify the source of the
problem. Think about the settings and people involved.
• Are they always the same?
• Or, do the same problems occur but with different people
and in different situations.
s
2. Make a list of possible ways to resolve them.
• Discuss your ideas with your child.
• Make a plan.
• If helpful, practice/role-play putting your plans into action.

MODELING
—Teaching by example
“Example is not the main thing in influencing others.
It is the only thing. ” Albert Schweitzer
Teach your children that education
is valuable and important to you.
Teach your children how to handle problems
and develop positive relationships.
Teach your children skills that will help
them develop confidence and self-reliance.

Teach your children that education is valuable and
important to you
• Share and explain your experiences, values, and beliefs about education. Talk about your own experiences, things
you have learned in life, and ways in which education has helped you
• Show sincere interest in what they are doing in school. Talk about their interests. Ask questions. Set goals together.
Get involved in your children’s school.
• Show how learning is used in everyday life. Help your children become aware of how you use math, reading, and
writing on a daily basis.
• Learn a new skill. Many school districts and community centers offer free classes in many subjects, including English,
math, and computer skills.
Think About It!
• Reflect on how you are doing in each of the 4 areas listed above. Is there one area that needs more attention? What is
one thing that you could do to improve in that area? Remember, keep it simple—little things can make a big difference!
• Watch the video, Hispanic Parents say, “Go to College!” Although each of these families is different, they are all
doing things that help prepare their children to go to college.. Identify some of the practices i n their homes that could
help you be more effective in your relationship with your children and in teaching the value of education.. Set a goal for
trying out one of the practices you have identified. Remember consistency over time is very important.
• Here are several videos that you could use to begin a discussion with your child about what it takes to go to college.
Discuss what they think the messages of these videos are and how they apply to their lives.
• College Access: Pursuing a Dream
• College Access: Persistence
• College Access: Algebra

Teach your children how to handle problems and
have positive relationships
 Behave as you would want your
children to behave. Speak calmly;
show concern for others; listen
respectfully to your children. (Video)
 Handle difficult situations in constructive ways. Children are watching
how adults handle conflict and will imitate them.
 When you are wrong, say so.
Children will see that it is okay to
admit mistakes when they see you
apologize and mean it.
Think About It!
• Review any notes and plans you made when you studied the last section, Relationships:
• Evaluate your progress.
• Do you need to make changes or adjustments to your plans?

Teaching your children skills will help them develop
confidence and a sense of self-efficacy
Self-efficacy is the belief that you have skills that you can rely on
to help you navigate life and reach your goals.
You can help your child develop a sense of self-efficacy by teaching
them how to
• Care for themselves and their belongings,
• Perform tasks around the home,
• Provide service to others,
• Help plan family projects and activities, and
• Explore their interests and try new activities.
By involving children in daily chores and family responsibilities they learn by observation
and hands-on experience. As they practice and become proficient, they gain confidence in
their ability to learn new things and effectively control their environment. At the same
time, you and they become aware of their strengths and their weaknesses. By making the
most of their strengths and being honest about their weaknesses, i.e., accepting that there
are areas where they may never excel as well as areas where they could improve, allows
children to have a positive, but realistic view of themselves.

Think About It!
An exercise in self-efficacy building skills
• Reread the article--
Self-Efficacy: Helping Children Believe They Can Succeed,
• On a card write the six ways “Adults Can Enhance Self-Efficacy.”
• Check off each time you use one of the principles.
• Also think about times when you missed the opportunity to use one of these principles .
Remember, it is consistency over time that has the greatest impact.
Challenge Negative thinking
Teach Goal Setting
Notice, analyze & celebrate success
Use process praise
Provide opportunity for mastery experience
Be honest and realistic

Summary of Goals and Plans for the
Six Factors that Support School Success
Your Goals (What?)
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Your Plans (How?
_________________________
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Time Frame (When?)
______________________
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______________________Back to Section SummaryBack to Part 2 Summary

Lesson 3
The Elementary
School Years:
Establishing a
Good Foundation

The Elementary Years: K – 6th Grade
Lesson Organization
In this lesson we will be covering a wide range of topics.
• Selecting a school
• Kindergarten readiness and preparation
• Transition from Kindergarten to First Grade
• Knowledge and skills to expect at each grade level
• Parent resources—which covers handling homework challenges,
Organization, study skills and online help with specific subjects
.
Selecting a School
The types of schools available, both public and private, have increased tremendously. Our purpose is to offer basic
criteria that parents would want to look for in whatever type of school they feel meets the needs of their child and
family. The links below are a good start for great information from the internet. Talking to other parents about their
experiences with specific schools can also provide insight.
• Three basic criteria for evaluating a school
http://www.greatschools.org/find-a-school/slideshows/3469-choosing-an-elementary-school.gs?page=1
• What to look for on an elementary school tour
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygqw27RIeIs
• Ten questions to ask in choosing a school
http://www.greatschools.org/find-a-school/making-the-right-choice/7055-choose-elementary-school-video.gs
Select those topics that meet your current needs.
Use your seminar journal and goal pages at the end of this lesson to record your ideas and plans

The Elementary Years:
Laying the Foundation in Kindergarten
The question all parents ask as their child turns five–
“Is my child ready for kindergarten?”
Here are the Readiness Skills Teachers Hope to See
Enthusiasm for Learning
• Is he eager to explore,
discover, ask questions, take
initiative and be persistent?
• Does he have the ability to
listen and follow directions?
Independence and Social Skills
• Does he have self-help skills for
eating, using
the bathroom, putting on and
taking off jackets?
• Can he play well with others,
take turns, share, solve
problems using words?
Foundation for Learning
• Does he have a strong
oral vocabulary and can
recognize letters and
numbers?
• Has he developed strong
fine motor skills from
coloring, using scissors
and play dough?
To learn more about kindergarten readiness go to:
http://www.scholastic.com/resources/article/ready-for-kindergarten
http://childparenting.about.com/od/schoollearning/a/parents-guide-to-kindergarten.htm
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Prepare-Your-Child-for-Kindergarten-264565914
http://www.readingrockets.org/article/23153/ Is my child ready for Kindergarten (also in Spanish)

Preparing for
the First Day!
Together explore what
kindergarten is like:
Read books
about kindergarten
--Visit the school
--Attend all events
the school offers
-Talk about what they think it
will be like and what they are
excited about.
Make it a special day
Ready, Set, Go to Kindergarten!
Registration
for Kindergarten
The age for entering
kindergarten is set by the
state. Check with the
school.
In the spring, contact the
school office to find out the
registration dates and the
documents you will need
such as: birth record, proof
of address, immunization
record & TB screening.
Follow this link
for more details.
Encouragement
Partner with the Teacher
• Introduce yourself to the
teacher.
• If you have time, volunteer
• Ask about activities to
reinforce learning at home
• Review materials on parent-
teacher partnerships
Partner with Your Child
• Talk about school, play
games, and do activities
related to what he is
learning.
• Read together.
• Help him be on time for
school
• Read/review all papers
brought home from school

Kindergarten to First Grade
--- A Big Step
 First grade is the beginning of a child’s formal education. The
focus of the first year in elementary school is on becoming an
independent reader, writer, and communicator, as well as on
starting to learn about science and social studies. To find out
more about what your child will be learning this first year, visit
your state Department of Education Website and follow this
link.
 How can parents prepare their child for the
transition to first grade? Make moving up easier
with these back to school tips. (Link)
 As children grow, they show many changes
in their abilities and behavior. Use the Child
Development Tracker at PBS. Org to explore
developmental changes for 5 and 6 year
olds.

The Elementary Years: 1-6th Grade
Each school year will bring new knowledge and skills that
reinforce previous learning and build new understanding
Knowing what to expect will help you prepare
for each new year at school.
 What to expect in 1st Grade
 What to expect in 2nd Grade
 What to expect in 3rd Grade
 What to expect in 4th Grade
What Your Child Should Know: Benchmarks for Grades K-5
No two kids are alike, especially when it comes to hitting developmental
benchmarks. But it helps to have a rough idea of which academic and social skills
your child should acquire at his or her grade level. Follow the above link as well as
check your state's academic standards to find out what students are required to
learn.

The Elementary Years: Help for Parents
Homework
Developing
study skills
Organization
Help with
specific subjects
The following pages offer resources to help parents
meet the challenges of homework, study skills, student
organization and specific subject areas such as math.

Homework and Study Skills :
Basic Guidelines and Organization
Organization Guidelines
• http://www.livestrong.com/article/101043-elementary-school-child-improve-organizational/
• http://www.livestrong.com/article/213258-organizational-skills-for-kids/
• http://www.5min.com/Video/School-Organization-in-3-Simple-Steps-517194106
• http://www.5min.com/Video/Learn-how-to-Help-Disorganized-Students-with-Homework-
145318063
Notebooks and Note Taking
• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fbf2Ky_7e8E&feature=related
• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igDbkrmDouw&feature=relmfu
Basic Guidelines
Five key skills for academic success
• https://www.greatschools.org/students/homework-help/60-five-skills-for-academic-success.gs
Establishing a homework routine
• https://www.greatschools.org/students/homework-help/4234-tips-for-no-hassle-homework-time-
video.gs
Developing good homework habits
• https://www.greatschools.org/students/homework-help/4345-help-child-develop-good-homework-
habits-video.gs

Getting Help with
Homework Challenges
Dealing with Specific Homework Challenges
Stress Over Homework
http://www.5min.com/Video/Reduce-Homework-Stress-with-Your-Child-517246767
Lying About Homework
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-Handle-Students-That-Lie-About-Homework-517298375
Underachievement
http://www.5min.com/Video/How-to-End-Student-Underachievement-517298380
Understanding Learning Styles
http://www.5min.com/Video/Understanding-Childrens-Learning-Styles-517199524
Refusing to Do Homework
http://www.5min.com/Video/What-To-Do-When-Your-Child-Refuses-To-Do-Homework-517331269
Rushing Through Homework
http://www.5min.com/Video/Tricks-to-Reduce-Rushing-Through-Homework-517231038
Procrastination
http://www.5min.com/Video/Learn-how-to-Help-Students-that-Procrastinate-Homework-145318368
Fidgeting
http://www.5min.com/Video/Learn-how-to-Help-Students-that-Always-Fidget-During-Homework-
145318481
Getting Emotional
http://www.5min.com/Video/Learn-how-to-Help-Students-that-Get-Emotional-During-Homework-
145318559
When to Get Outside Help
http://www.5min.com/Video/When-Do-You-Need-Outside-Help-with-Homework-145318711

Study Skills/Subject Area Help
General On-line Homework Help Sites
Factmonster.com http://www.factmonster.com/homework/
Kid Info. Com http://www.kidinfo.com/School_Subjects.html
Education World.com http://www.educationworld.com/students/study/
Homework Spot http://www.homeworkspot.com /
Reading Links
focus on K-2 http://www.scholastic.com/resources/article/partner-with-your-childs- –grade-k2-teacher/
improving fluency http://www.greatschools.org/reading/4257-help-your-child-read-naturally-video.gs
developing a love for reading http://www.greatschools.org/reading/4256-How-to-create-a-love-for-reading-video.gs
choosing books at the appropriate level http://www.greatschools.org/Reading/4339-Finding-right-books-for-child-video.gs
Improving vocabulary and comprehension by telling your own stories http://www.greatschools.org/reading/4255-Help-
your-child-with-vocabulary-and-comprehension-video.gs
Websites Designed to Encourage Reading by Boys—book lists, suggestions for parents, etc.
http://www.boysread.org/
http://gettingboystoread.com/
http://www.guysread.com/
Math Links
http://www.greatschools.org/special-education/LD-ADHD/673-tips-for-helping-your-elementary-school-child-with-math-
homework.gs
http://www.barcodesinc.com/articles/mobile-math-list.htm
http://www.coolmath.com/
http://www.math.com/

Seminar Journal Notes for
The Elementary School Years

Summary of Goals and Plans for
the Elementary Years Lesson
Your Goals (What?)
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Your Plans (How?
_________________________
_________________________
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_________________________
_________________________
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_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
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_________________________
_________________________
Time Frame (When?)
______________________
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______________________
______________________
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______________________Back to Lesson SummaryBack to Part 2 Summary

Lesson 4
The Middle
School Years:
Beginning to Plan
for College

The Middle School Years
Transitioning to Middle School The challenges of middle school revolve around the new, unfamiliar
environment—a bigger school, lots of new people (strangers) to deal with, five or six teachers instead of
two or three, lockers, and multiple classrooms to navigate to. Your child will be making social
adjustments—meeting new friends, perhaps loosing touch with old friends, dealing with peer pressure,
and adjusting to the physical and emotional changes of puberty. Parents need to work to help their
children feel comfortable and confident in this new environment.
Preparing for College Begins in Middle School . Your expectations and confidence in your child’s
abilities will have a powerful influence on what he expects of himself. Whether you have gone to
college or not, as a parent you are in the best position to help your child set goals and make good
decisions about career preparation and training beyond high school. The middle school years are the
time to start planning for college in a serious way.
Academic Importance of Middle School Middle school is a critical time. It is a time for preparing
for high school—for mastering and building on what has been learned in elementary school and
preparing to take on the academic demands of high school. Students who are working at grade level
when then leave middle school will be prepared to succeed in high school. Research shows students’
academic achievement by 8th grade has a greater impact on college and career readiness than high
school academic work. (United Way reference)

Transition
--Changes and Challenges
The changes and challenges of middle school
could not come at a worse time. As young
adolescents, they are losing interest in school
work and performance, gaining interest in
friendships and independence, and becoming
more and more distracted by the physical and
emotional changes of puberty. At this crucial
moment, they are thrust into a much more
demanding school environment.
Things that middle school students
worry about the most:
• Getting lost or finding classes
• Opening the locker
• Making new friends
• Having more than one teacher
• Carrying around all those books
• Being bullied or teased,
• Getting good grades
• Coping with physical and
emotional changes that come
with puberty.
Middle school students encounter:
• More teachers and varied teaching styles
• Less personal relationships with teachers
• A heavier academic workload
• More homework
• More long-term projects to organize
• Tougher grading.

Parents to the Rescue
Helping your middle school student feel comfortable and confident
 Attend school orientation and take notes. If you know who your child’s teachers will be, take the
opportunity to introduce yourself to them. This may be held in the spring for incoming students.
 Carefully read all information that is handed out, sent home, or provided on the school website so that
you understand school policies and who to contact if you or your child have questions.
 Visit the campus before school starts; go to the campus together and just walk around and learn where
things are—the gym/PE area, the cafeteria, the administration office, the library, the music rooms. If he
has his schedule of classes, so much the better; he will be able to find the rooms where his classes meet
and work out the best routes to use getting from one class to the next.
 Practice opening the assigned locker. If that is not possible buy or borrow a similar lock and practice
with it.
 Talk with your child about his concerns and fears. Let him know it is normal to be nervous, he is not
alone--all new students feel the same way. Share experiences you have had in confronting a new
situation and overcoming your fears. Assure him that during the first week he will learn the routine and
feel more confident.
 Continue talking with your child about his school experiences—listen attentively and do not criticize.
Because friendships are shifting and changing as children begin middle school you may be the main
person he has to share his concerns and question with.

Find a time to talk to your child about his concerns or worries related to beginning middle
school. What are three or four things you can do to make the transition easier?
Notes:
THINK ABOUT IT!

Academic Environment
Mission of Middle School: Growing Expectations
Classes are more challenging, and homework demands
increase. Parents need to help their children succeed.
The high school dropout problem begins in middle school.
Some classes are prerequisites for high school classes.
Teachers expect students to act more responsibly--
to develop greater self-management and “social-
system” skills.

Growing Expectations
• It’s important to understand that middle school teachers do not care less about their
students, they just care differently.
• They expect students to act more responsibly. They want students to learn the self-
management and social skills that will help them to be successful in high school.
• Self-management skills include
1) Developing the discipline to keep track of homework assignments,
2) Fostering the work ethic to complete it well and on time,
3) Going to class prepared and on time, and
4) Attending school and not skipping classes
Social-system skills can be described as the three C’s
Conform to routines.
Comply with rules.
Cooperate with authority.

Growing Expectations Exercise
Before completing this exercise,
finish reading the materials in “The Middle School Years” lesson
Personal Assignment:
Think about what your expectations are for your middle-school student and write them down.
How would you describe a student who practiced the three C’s?
A few weeks after school has started, plan a time to talk to your child about how things are going.
Things you might include in the discussion are:
• What is going well? What are his worries and concerns? How can you help?
• Talk about what he wants to achieve this year, and listen to his thoughts and feelings .
• Come to an agreement on a set of realistic, challenging expectations and goals and put them
in writing. Don’t forget to include positive and negative consequences.
• Ask your child what he/she thinks it means to practice the three C’s.
Compare notes.

Growing Academic Challenges
Because the academic workload is heavier in middle school, better organization
skills are needed to manage the daily homework and long-term projects. This
checklist suggests ways parents can support their student.
Checklist to help your student succeed academically in middle school---
 Help your child develop organizational skills:
1) Require an assignment notebook or planner. If the school doesn’t provide one,
create your own.
2) Put up a large calendar where it can be seen every day. Have your child post the due
dates of projects and special assignments.
3) Help your child break big projects into smaller sections and set dates for the
completion of each section.
4) Encourage your child to make a daily list of the things he needs to do.
 Read the syllabi for each course. This should give you information about classroom
policies and expectations and provide a timeline for major projects and assignments.

Checklist for helping students succeed, cont’d
 Check homework. Check to see that homework assignments are being completed on time. Try to
help your student avoid the stress created when large assignments are put off until the night
before they are due. Encourage working on them each day.
 Monitor and set limits on electronic communication and “screen time”, i.e., cell phone talking and
texting, computer messaging, and social networking. These activities can cut heavily into study
time.
 Keep the linens of communication open between you and your child. Although they want to
spend more and more time with their peers, try to make the most of dinner-time conversations
and travel time. Look for opportunities to listen as well as to express your confidence and
affection.
 Keep in contact with teachers via phone or e-mail and make sure teachers know that you want to
be contacted if assignments are late or missing, if there are behavior problems, if grades are
slipping or if he is missing class.
 Which items on this list would be most helpful to your child?
 Think about the best way to put them into practice.
 Record your ideas on the Academic Challenge worksheet.

Do your student’s study skills need a boost?
Here are some videos to recommend
to your child or watch and talk about together
General
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=aL2PznzUjj0&NR=1
Listening, Reading, Note-taking, Studying
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuCAb8b6g34&feature=related
SQ4R How to Read Text books effectively
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UafJRBvaOEo&feature=related
Using Class Time Effectively
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=UrB52H7rHqI
Taking and Organizing Class Notes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXTpdiJ4fZE&feature=related
Test Taking
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyEW6PueUps&feature=channel&list=UL

Academic Challenge Worksheet
• Notes on plans for implementing items on the checklist
• Study skills your student needs to improve.
Do not overwhelm yourself or your child by trying to make too many “improvements” at once.
Choose two or three of the most important skills or practices to improve and work on them
consistently before moving on to other areas on your list.

The High School Dropout Problem
Begins in Middle School
Staying on Track for High School Graduation
The middle school years are the time when many students begin to fall behind and
get “off-track” for high school and college success. Many students are only
performing on a fifth/sixth grade level when they enter high school. These are the
students who will more than likely drop out or not graduate from high school on
time.
Key indicators that a middle school student is “off-track”:
• Failing math,
• Failing English/reading,
• “D” grades,
• Low attendance (80% or less), and
• Mild but frequent misbehavior.
Any one of these problems indicates your child needs help!
Contact the school counselor and individual teachers at the first sign of any
of these problems, and get the help your child needs.

Preparing for College
Begins in Middle School
Identify Interests
Create a “College Culture” in the Home
Take the Right Courses
Explore and Plan
Learn about College

Creating a College Culture at home--
Share your thoughts and feelings about the importance of college to your child’s future. Kids who grow up with “When you
go to college” rather than “if you go to college” are more likely to see themselves as college -bound.
Let your child know that you have confidence in his or her ability to succeed in college. Set clear expectations by emphasizing
the idea that school does not end with high school.
Demonstrate that you are a life-long learner yourself. Reading, learning new skills, having a hobby that encourages you to learn
and explore, and talking to your child about the new things you learn sets a great example.
Take the time to learn about college together.
• Discuss college options (community, technical, two- and four-year, colleges and universities, in state or out of state) --
many options to choose from
• Visit local college campuses in your area. Attend events if possible.
• Stay informed about college costs, available scholarships and grant opportunities. Start saving for college, even if it is
just a small amount each month. Encourage kids to earn money and save part of it for college.
• Learn about cost-cutting strategies such as: getting college credits by taking Advanced Placement (AP) classes in high
school or taking classes at your local community college during the summer
Encourage your children to evaluate their interests and strengths and explore career options.
• Help your child see the connection between college and career.
• Encourage your child’s aspirations and talents.
• Recent research has shown that when middle school students understand how important their academic
performance is to their future job prospects and are provided specific strategies to study and learn they do better in
school. They need guidance from parents to help make the link between school and their aspirations for future work.
(See study by Nancy E. Hill, Harvard University)
Continue to make reading an important part of family life.
Encourage your child to read and read and read. It is the best way to build vocabulary, comprehension, and speed as well as
prepare for the SAT or ACT college entrance exams.
As a family watch the video from the above link and talk about what going to college can mean

Discussion Guide for
Creating a College Culture in Your Home
• Watch the video with your family and discuss what going to college could mean in their lives.
• Listen carefully to what your children say. Write down their ideas and think about them.
• Do you feel your children are “on track” to be ready for college?

Learning More–
Helpful Videos and Articles for Early College Planning
Importance of starting college prep early.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlUWOY-UgMs&list=UUUI6TNsmH8scRCiufD8fQ2g&index=10&feature=plcp
Is middle school too early to talk about college--2 minutes—other videos by same organizations
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6nwrM5g6bI&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6nwrM5g6bI&feature=related
Getting ready for college starts in middle school
http://www2.ed.gov/pubs/GettingReadyCollegeEarly/step2.html
Outstanding booklet on preparation from middle through high school (available in English and Spanish)
http://www.hsf.net/ choose “publications” and choose “Destination University”
Parent action plan checklist
https://bigfuture.collegeboard.org/get-started/for-parents/parent-action-plan-middle-school
A middle school parents guide to college preparation—article
http://www.greatschools.org/college-prep/planning/594-middle-school-parents-college-prep-guide.gs
College prep in middle school—1 page, simple straightforward, links to articles on preparing for college in 9, 10, 11th grade
Congressional Hispanic Caucus Institute –links to many helpful websites
http://www.chci.org/education_center/page/tools-and-resources-for-parents-and-youth
Harvard study reports advantages of linking education and job prospects
http://www.topnews.in/linking-education-future-job-prospects-may-boost-middle-school-students-grades-2168935
Good site for parents and middle school student to explore together
http://www.knowhow2go.org/middle.php
16 videos in Spanish & English about college admissions, cost, etc. for parents
https://bigfuture.collegeboard.org/get-started/video-gallery?filter=forParents
List of resources
http://collegeadmissionbook.com/resources/
Role of counselor in preparing for post-high school education
http://www.5min.com/Video/School-Counseling---Life-After-High-School-516995334
English-Spanish glossary for student aid
http://www.fsa4counselors.ed.gov/clcf/EngSpaGlossary.html

Take the Right Courses
Preparing for College Begins in Middle School
Become informed about the school system. Although high school graduation and college are six or
seven years away, the classes taken in middle school (and middle school academic performance) are
critical to college preparation and success. Here are important things to keep in mind:
Talk with the school counselor to make sure your child is on the right track for college preparation.
Without these courses a student will not be ready to take college prep courses in high school.
Math: take math every year, algebra by the 8th grade and geometry by the 9th grade
English: Take a class every year
History and science: Take as many classes as possible
Foreign language: Two years of a foreign language are required by many colleges, and your child
can often begin to take them in middle school.
Computer science: Take advantage of any computer science classes offered. If possible, learn a
word processing program such as Microsoft Word.
Encourage your child to take the most challenging courses he can handle. Tackling tough courses can
give your child confidence and prepare him for higher level high school classes.
Action Plan:
• Talk with the school counselor in the spring before middle school. begins
• Start a file or notebook for keeping track of important papers and notes on conversations with counselors and teachers.
• Put a date on all papers & notes.

Plan and Explore.
Order a copy of this
workbook now!
This workbook is also available on line as a PDF file so that you can download it and print or
save it. Go to http://www.edpubs.gov
To order copies of this publication:
Order online at: http://www.edpubs.gov
Order by E-mail: edpubs@inet.ed.gov
Order by phone: 1-877-433-7827
Order using a telecommunications for the
deaf (TDD) 1-877-576-7734

Identify Interests
Encourage your child to evaluate his or her interests and strengths and explore career options.
Use a 3-ring binder to organize materials
 Use the internet to help with this process. Here are a few sites you could watch together :
Career exploration from an early age
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9KawhtfORI
“Where are you heading?” inspirational cartoon video to watch with children about
Importance of planning ahead—being willing to invest in the future
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=C4Osvr2L0uw
Very basic and good–good for parent-child discussion
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=AgyjmO9h-6k&NR=1
Motivational—chariots of fire music, pictures, quotes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fvwrel&NR=1&v=8H_eT7posEg
 Talking to people with jobs that are of interest can help your child understand what it’s like to
work in different fields.
 Encourage your child to take electives or participate in extracurricular activities that will help
him explore strong interests and develop his talents.
 Visit college campuses to get a feeling for what they are like. If possible visit colleges that offer
programs that are of special interest to your child.

Summary of Goals and Plans for
The Middle School Years
Your Goals (What?)
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
Your Plans (How?
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
Time Frame (When?)
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________Back to Part 2 Summary Back to Lesson Summary

Lesson 5
The High School
Years:
Preparing for
College

The High School Years
Transition to High School—Nurturing Personal Growth and Responsibility
The anxieties your teen experienced as he began middle school may return as he enters high school. You
can help by continuing to use good parenting practices adapted to the age and maturity of your child and
helping with the transition Parents Really Matter!!!
Academic Success in High School—Importance of Coming Prepared
Students’ experiences in their first year of high school often determine their success through high school
and beyond. Unfortunately, more students fail ninth grade than any other grade. Why? Because they are
not adequately prepared. They were not on grade level in core subjects when they graduated from middle
school/junior high school. Parents can help their new high school students succeed!
Preparing and Planning for College
Parents continue to play a very important role in promoting college-going to their children. Without your
support, encouragement, and help with the decisions that need to be made, they are less likely to go to
college. There are many resources to help you help your student plan and prepare for college.

Transition to High School--Nurturing Personal Growth and Responsibility
The transition from middle school or junior high to high school is a somewhat scary,
but significant rite of passage. The fear of anonymity, unfamiliar surroundings, and
higher expectations all contribute to anxiety about beginning high school.
Seven things parents can do as school
begins:
1. Listen
2. Get them involved
3. Help your child learn the ropes
4. Focus on details
5. Use summer wisely
6. Support academic adjustment
7. Know when to seek help.
--Go to the following page
The “Basic Parenting Practices for
School Success”---
• Clear and reasonable expectations
• Structure
• Modeling
• Learning experiences
• Support
• Love and affection
--will be expressed in new ways

Seven Tips to Help Teens Successfully Transition to High School
Each year as summer draws to a close, thousands of children will take one more step toward a significant rite of passage: they will
transition from being middle school or junior high students to becoming full-fledged high schoolers. This transition for kids is scary – the
fear of anonymity, unfamiliar surroundings ,and higher expectations all play a central role in the anxiety leading up to the start of one’s
high school career. There are things, however, that parents can do to assist with this transition.
1. Listen
Parents should not discount their children’s fears by just telling them “it will be all right.” Change can be frightening. Parents should
reassure their kids that they will not be alone in this process. Children at this age need emotional security, support and a listening ear.
Your child is anxious about this transition and wants to know that you are an ally.
2. Get involved
When students are involved with extracurricular activities, such as theater, art club, or sports, it helps them feel that they belong.
Encouraging involvement in organized school activities fosters teamwork and a sense of place, which ultimately leads to confidence.
And confidence comes with inclusion.
3.Help your child learn the ropes
Many school districts have freshman orientation programs that allow time for incoming freshmen to get oriented to the physical plant.
For example, schools usually allow students to come in and try out locker combinations, locate classrooms, and get comfortable with
their new surroundings. For students who have their schedules, parents can suggest that they walk through the building as if they were
coming and going from classes.
If students have to take a bus to school, parents should help them plan in advance. Students should know where to get on, when to get
on and where to get off. This is especially important for students who have to take multiple buses to school.
4. Eliminate stress by focusing on details
The more attention parents pay to small details, the easier things will be for a student on day one. For example, most schools mail
students their new schedules over the summer. Parents should look over their child’s schedule to ensure it appears to be correct. No
matter how much little Billy tries to coerce his parents into believing he is supposed to have three gym classes, he shouldn’t. Scheduling
mistakes do happen, and if there is a problem, counselors are usually available a couple of weeks prior to the start of classes to get
these issues resolved. Addressing any scheduling errors early can save your child from waiting in line and missing classes while his/her
schedule is changed.

Seven Tips for Transitioning to High School (continued)
5. Prepare for the summer brain drain
Almost every student loses a little ground over the summer. However, if your child has done poorly in a subject, you should
try to help him/her find a related enrichment activity over the summer. This will increase your child’s self esteem and help
him prepare academically for the start of the school year.
6. Recognize that adjustments to the high school curriculum take time
It will take some time to adjust to the higher academic standards increased competition of high school. Often students earn
their lowest GPA freshman year, and then begin to figure things out. When students are asked: “If you could start high school
over again, what would you do differently?” many answer that they would take freshman year more seriously. Some don’t
even understand that their freshman grades are part of the high school transcript that is submitted when they apply to
college.
7. Know when to seek help
After the first couple of weeks, if your child is having debilitating anxiety or is abnormally worried about school, seek help.
Many students will exhibit uneasiness and a decrease in self-esteem, but adjustment problems lasting longer than a few
weeks may require special help.
Parents know their children and know when they are having drastic mood swings or acting uncharacteristically. If you notice
a change in your child’s eating or sleeping habits, it’s time to talk with someone.
During this time, never forget to love your children unconditionally. While they are crossing over into adulthood, understand
that change is hard and their fears are real. Students today are more stressed out than they have ever been. It’s a reflection
of what is going on in our communities and our society. We have so many complex problems – including heightened
economic pressures, changes in family structure, persistent violence, cyber-bullying, etc. – but there are also more resources
to deal with these problems than we had 20 years ago.
Parents, teachers, counselors and school leaders need to work collaboratively to help promote a favorable school
adjustment. Nobody can do it alone.
By Bonnie Rubenstein, professor of education at the Warner School of Education at the University of Rochester.
Published July29, 2012, Fox News.com

Parents Matter! The six basic parenting practices for school success are still important --
but they will be expressed in new ways as teens become more independent.
Clear and reasonable expectations—
Good effort and attitude are just as important as good grades.
Watch for too much stress. Trying to do too many things can cause
teens to feel overwhelmed. Signs of too much stress include
exhaustion, withdrawal, aggression, inability to concentrate,
moodiness, and out-of the ordinary behavior.
Learning—you are still your teens’ most important teacher.
Teaching life skills such as money management, grocery shopping
preparing meals, cleaning, and laundry will make living
independently much less stressful when the time comes.
Talk with your teens about all kinds of things. Encourage them to
tell you about what they are learning ,and share things that you are
learning.
Encourage them to get involved in the community through
volunteering, after-school programs, sports, etc. Be prepared to
provide transportation or make arrangements for getting to and
from these activities.
Structure—
Talk about the self-discipline and planning and organizational skills
needed to meet the increasing demands of schoolwork and extra-
curricular and social activities.
Be there. Try to have one parent home or available when teens
leave for school and when they get home. If that is not possible,
figure out a way to connect sometime after school. The
unsupervised time after school before a parent returns from work
is the time when teens are most likely to get into trouble.

Six Basic Parenting Practices (Cont’d)
Support—
Teens still need to feel your interest and know that you are there to help when needed
Talk with them about future plans, and advise and guide them toward choices that will lead
to their goals
Relationships—
Be ready to talk. Be ready to listen when your teen wants to talk, even when it is not
especially convenient for you. Create frequent opportunities for casual chats with your
teen, such as taking a walk, having a snack or meal and doing household tasks
together.
Be involved in your teen’s life. Know his or her friends and interests. Know what’s
going on.
Teens still need affection, but they may not want it publicly displayed.
Modeling—
Teens learn moral and spiritual values best by the example you set. Actions speak
louder than words.
Talk about life’s lessons. Share with your teens what you have learned. Also share life
lessons and experiences from the lives of ancestors.
Help your teen learn how to work on projects and assignments by identifying the steps
involved in accomplishing them.

Parenting Practices Evaluation Exercise
As you review the six basic parenting practices, think about how you are applying them now.
 Do they reflect the independence and maturity of your child ?
 Do you need to consider changes in the way you apply these practices in order to have a
better relationship with your child and be a more effective in helping your child succeed?

Academic Success in High School
Why do more students fail ninth grade than any other grade?
Because they are not on grade level in core subjects when they enter high school.
Parents can help their student succeed
• Anticipate/prevent
• Monitor homework completion
• Provide assistance
• Promote a
positive attitude
Watch for warning signs that a
freshman is “off-track”
• More than one semester “F”
in core subjects
• Fewer than five full course credits
by the end of freshman year.
This problem is most pronounced for
African American and Latino students
in urban, high-poverty schools.
These are the students most likely to
drop out of high school
Ninth grade really is
important for college.

Parents Can Help Their New High School Student---
Academics
Students’ experiences in their first year of high school often determine their success throughout high school and beyond.
Unfortunately, more students fail ninth grade than any other grade. This problem is most pronounced for African American
and Latino students in urban, high-poverty schools. More than one semester “F” in core subjects and fewer than five full
course credits by the end of freshman year are warning indicators that a student in not “on-track” for graduation.
How parents can help their new high school student (thus avoiding this unhappy scenario)---
By anticipating and preventing problems: If at the completion of middle school or junior high your teen is not at least on
grade level in reading, math, and language arts, then enrolling in a summer program or getting tutoring that focuses on
these core skills will help get him off to a better start. Ideally, monitoring how well the student is doing in these core areas
during middle school would allow him to seek help and work hard to be on grade level when he moves on to high school.
Organization of time and work is still challenging, and the organization system established in middle school is still needed.
By monitoring homework completion and grades. Know what is expected in each of his classes by reading the syllabus.
With input from your teen, set reasonable expectations and goals. Make sure the goals are clearly understood—including
negative and positive consequences related to effort as well as outcomes.
By providing or arranging for assistance when needed. Getting help early while a problem is still small can help avoid a lot
of frustration and discouragement. Don’t hesitate to contact teachers when you feel there is a problem. If you do not feel
qualified to help, many high schools have peer tutoring programs (or the teacher can arrange for a peer tutor when a student
is struggling in his class). If that is not possible you may know a friend or an older student who could be a mentor. There are
lots of resources on the internet that could give a student the extra help they need to keep up with the class assignments.
Here are just a few websites that could be helpful :
http://www.discoveryeducation.com/ , http://www.math.com/students/homeworkhelp.html ,
http://www.webmath.com/ http://library.thinkquest.org/20991/sitemap/
Promote and maintain a positive attitude. Studies have shown that students are motivated to do their best when they
understand how their school performance is related to their career aspirations. Yes, high school classes may be a lot more
challenging than middle school, but with persistence, hard work, and a willingness to accept help, success can be achieved.
Continuing to express affection, warmth ,and encouragement (and avoiding criticism and expressions of doubt) will help
maintain a positive feeling in your relationship and in the home.

Ninth Grade Matters for College Admissions. Make the Most of It!
Math 4 years recommended—Algebra I & II, Geometry, or
higher level
English 4 years of college preparatory English composition and
literature
History & Soc. Studies 3 years or check on requirements of specific colleges
Laboratory Science 3 years recommended—include a biological and a physical
science such as chemistry or physics
Foreign Language 2 years of same language required: 4 years recommended
College Preparatory
Electives
1 year of the same subject required. Examples: Drama,
Ceramics, Music, Computer Science, Statistics, Psychology
Parents continue to play a very important role in promoting college-going to their children.
Without your support, encouragement, and help with the decisions that need to be made, they are less likely to go to college.
The primary advice for 9th grade students can be boiled down to this:
Take demanding courses,
Keep your grades up, and
Be active outside of the classroom.
Go to http://collegeapps.about.com/od/admissionstimeline/tp/ninth-grade-college-prep.htm for more detail on these points.
Meet with the school counselor to make sure your child is on the right track for college preparation. Most colleges will
require--
Learn more about the recommended courses for a college preparatory curriculum at www.collegeboard.com
or at the Hispanic Scholarship Fund website: http://www.hsf.org

Making the Most of Ninth Grade (cont’d)
Encourage your child
To take the most challenging courses he can handle. Tackling tough courses can give him confidence and
prepare him for higher level high school classes.
Evaluate interests and strengths and explore career options. Extra-curricular activities in high school are an
ideal way to do that, and colleges are looking for students that are well rounded and have interests and
accomplishment beyond the classroom.
Visit http://www.aie.org/finding-a-career/ for information and resources on possible career paths and the
degrees commonly required.
Attend any informational meetings about college offered by the high school.
Continue the efforts toward college that you began during middle school, learning all you can about college
requirements, admissions, and costs, and creating a “college-culture” in the home. If you haven’t already
done so, begin a savings program (no matter how small) that your child can contribute to. Begin to explore
scholarship possibilities.
Continue to encourage your child to read and read and read.
It is the best way to build vocabulary, comprehension, and speed as well as prepare for the SAT or ACT
college entrance exams. It doesn’t matter whether they are reading great literature or a magazine, reading
still exposes them to new vocabulary and ideas.

Assignment: Learn more about high school course
requirements for college
• Find out about the recommended courses for a college preparatory curriculum at
www.collegeboard.com or at the Hispanic Scholarship Fund website: http://www.hsf.org
• Notes:

Preparing for College in High School
is like eating an elephant
—it is best done one bite at a time.
Besides doing well in the classes required for college and taking
AP classes that can earn college credit, there are other things
to consider such as;
• Exploring interests and career options
• Developing talents and leadership skills through extracurricular activities
• Researching colleges and college programs
• Planning for college costs through savings programs, scholarships, and financial aid
• Preparing for and taking college entrance exams such as the SAT and ACT.
• Preparing applications and meeting application deadlines
Here are resources to guide you through each year of high school ---
http://www.hsf.net/uploadedFiles/About_HSF/DU_English_08.pdf
https://bigfuture.collegeboard.org/get-started/for-parents
And here is an excellent article suggesting ways to help your future college
student develop habits and skills for independent living:
http://www.collegeparentcentral.com/2011/02/using-senior-year-to-prepare-your-
student-for-college-success/
Carefully study the materials on the websites above.

Worksheet
Preparing for College in High School
Get a three-ring binder to organize college related materials.
• Add pocket dividers and a current calendar to the binder and update it each year.
• In one section of the binder keep
– Contact information for the school counselor and anyone else that you communicate with about college
– notes on conversations or e-mails from the school counselor or other people you may talk to about college
requirements. Make the notes during the conversation and date them.
• Your student should also use the binder for organizing materials and information so keep it in a convenient place.
• Keep all information up to date . Discard information that is out of date
At the beginning of each year of high school, mark on your calendar
• Regular times to keep in touch with your student’s counselor,
• Important dates for submission of applications,
• Test registration dates,
• School events related to college admission, etc.
Carefully study the materials on the websites listed on the previous page.
Also revisit/review college preparation materials introduced in the middle school years lesson
• 16 videos in Spanish & English about college admissions, cost, etc. for parents
https://bigfuture.collegeboard.org/get-started/video-gallery?filter=forParents
• List of resources
http://collegeadmissionbook.com/resources/
• Role of counselor in preparing for post-high school education
http://www.5min.com/Video/School-Counseling---Life-After-High-School-516995334

Goals and Plans Worksheet:
The High School Years
Your Goals (What?)
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
Your Plans (How?
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
Time Frame (When?)
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________

Lesson 6
College-Bound:
Supporting Your
College Student

On to College
On-going Support and Help
Whether your high school graduate will be living at home and attending a college nearby or packing his or her
bags and heading for a more distant campus, this is a year of transition for everyone. It is true that your student
must do the work of college, but you will provide an important and necessary support system.
Your Role as a College Parent: Being a Sideline Coach—3 Parts
College Parents Can Help Freshmen Overcome First Semester Challenges.
Getting off to a Good Start the Freshman Year
For many high school graduates, preparing for college means getting a summer job to earn money for the many
expenses that will come as they start their freshman year. However, there are other things to think about and
learn that will be of great value. Check out these articles for ideas that will be helpful to your college student:
Summer Preparation before the Freshman Year
Five Conversations Parents and College Students Should Have before the First Year of College
10 Things You Can Do to Increase Your Student’s College Readiness
Eight Life Skills Your College Student Should Know
College Students and Credit Cards
Helping Your College Student Living at Home; What Can You Do?
College Students Living at Home: What Are the Issues?
Tips for Supporting the College Student Who Still Lives at Home
Many other useful articles can be found at: http://www.collegeparentscentral.com and at
http://www.collegeparents.org/
Back to Part 2 Summary

Goals and Plans Worksheet:
On to College
Your Goals (What?)
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
_____________________
Your Plans (How?
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
Time Frame (When?)
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________
______________________

Parent seminar student guide -part 2--the school years--rev 1

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Parent seminar student guide -part 2--the school years--rev 1

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