Learn and practice these fundamental principles will make you a better friend and help you to get noticed in this noisy world. Sincerely listening to other people's ideas will enhance your ability to having your voice heard. This is key to improving your communications both online and offline.
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Timeless principles in making friends and influencing people
1. Timeless Principles
in
Making Friends
and
Influencing People
Facilitator: Joyce Li
www.FullnessOfLife.com Feb 2013 1
2. Workshop Goals
1. Practice these timeless principles:
The 3-C Principle in Handling People
The L-I-O-N Principle to Make People Like You
12 Principles in Influencing People and Winning Souls
2. Celebrate your communication
strengths and commit to work on at
least 2 growth areas in building strong
relationships
www.FullnessOfLife.com Why
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3. Why Practice these Principles:
Help Build Strong
Relationships
• Open Doors for Future
Opportunities
• Reach Out to Influence Others
• Help Each Other through
Ice Breaker
Networking
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4. People are Different
Popular Sanguine Powerful Choleric
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Peaceful Phlegmatic
www.FullnessOfLife.com Perfect Melancholy
5. Friends…
A) Think about your best friend…
◦ What do you like about him/her?
B) Think about the person that you would
avoid sitting next to during a party…
◦ What bothers you about him/her?
www.FullnessOfLife.com Outline
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6. Outline
Part I
3-C Principles in Handling People
Part II
L-I-O-N Principles to Make People Like You
Part III
12 Principles in Influencing People
Workshop material adapted from “How To Win Friends And Influence People” by Dale Carnegie
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7. 3-C Principles in Handling People
What are your 3-Cs?
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8. 3-C Principles in Handling
People
1. Cultivate a genuine interest in other’s
well-being
2. Credit the other person’s “emotional
account”
3. Create an appetite for more of you
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9. 3.1 Cultivate a genuine interest
in other’s well-being
1. What is in it for them?
2. What are their needs?
3. Don’t criticize or condemn
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10. 3.2 Credit the other person’s
“Emotional Account”
Acknowledge and show sincere
appreciation
Making deposits into their “emotional
bank account1” or “love bank2”
Note 1: Concept from Dr. Stephen Covey’s book – 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Note 2: Concept from Dr. Gary Chapman’s book – Five Love Languages
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11. 3.3 Create an appetite for more
of you
Making yourself loveable:
◦ Amiable (pleasing, being
friendly, social, admirable)
◦ Being helpful
◦ Generate positive energy
www.FullnessOfLife.com 3 Cs Recap
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12. 3-C Principles in Handling People
Recap:
1. Cultivate a genuine interest in other’s
well-being
2. Credit the other person’s “emotional
account”
3. Create an appetite for more of you
www.FullnessOfLife.com Reflection
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13. Reflection
Do you have a “favorite” principle, why?
www.FullnessOfLife.com L-I-O-N Principles to Make People Like You
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15. L-I-O-N Principles to
Make People Like You
Listen Well - Be a good listener
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16. L-I-O-N Principles to
Make People Like You
Importance -
Make the other person feel important
www.FullnessOfLife.com (do it sincerely)
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17. L-I-O-N Principles to
Make People Like You
Other’s Interest First - Talk about things
that interest him/her 投其所好
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18. L-I-O-N Principles to
Make People Like You
Name - Remember his/her name
Michelle,
I will surely miss you
when you go away
for University!
Rebecca,
I’ll miss you too!
www.FullnessOfLife.com L-I-O-N Principles Recap
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19. L-I-O-N Principles to
Make People Like You
Recap
1. Listen Well - Be a good listener
2. Importance - Make the other person
feel important (do it sincerely)
3. Other’s Interest First - Talk about things
that interest him/her 投其所好
4. Name - Remember his/her name
www.FullnessOfLife.com Reflection
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20. Reflection
Go to your partner, have a chat -practice
being “amiable”
5 minutes
Debrief
www.FullnessOfLife.com 12 Principles in Influencing People and Winning Souls
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21. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
1. Avoid arguments
2. Show respect for his/her opinions -
Never say “you’re wrong”
3. If you are wrong, admit it
4. Be a sincere friend
5. Let the other person talk
6. Get the other person saying “yes, yes”
immediately
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22. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
7. Get cooperation by letting him/her feel
that the idea is his or hers
8. See things from his/her point of view
9. Be sympathetic with his/her ideas and
desires
10. Appeal to the nobler motives (higher
standards, causes, goals or
aspirations, etc.)
11. Dramatize your ideas
12. Throw down a challenge
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23. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#1 Avoid arguments
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24. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#2 Show respect for his/her opinions -
Never say “you’re wrong”
You are
dog
wrong!
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25. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#3 If you are
wrong, admit it
I am so sorry to cause
such a scene, next time I
will avoid rush hour
traffic!
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26. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#4 Be a sincere friend
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Mar 4, 2011 MCAC English Adult Fellowship 26
27. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#5 Let the other person talk
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Mar 4, 2011 MCAC English Adult Fellowship 27
28. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#6 Get the other person saying “yes, yes”
immediately
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29. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#7 Get cooperation by letting him/her
feel that the idea is his or hers
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30. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#8 See things from his/her point of view
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31. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#9 Be sympathetic with his/her ideas and
desires
>>>>>>>>>
%%%%%%
<<<<<<<<
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32. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#10 Appeal to the
nobler motives
(higher
standards, cause
s, goals or
aspirations, etc.)
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33. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#11 Dramatize your ideas
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34. 12 Principles in Influencing
People
#12 Throw down a challenge
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35. 12 Principles in Influencing
People and Winning Souls
1. Avoid arguments
2. Show respect for his/her opinions – Avoid “you’re wrong”
3. If you are wrong, admit it
4. Be a sincere friend
5. Let the other person talk
6. Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately
7. Letting him/her feel that the idea is his or hers
8. See things from his/her point of view
9. Be sympathetic with his/her ideas and desires
10. Appeal to the nobler motives, aspirations, etc.
11. Dramatize your ideas
12. Throw down a challenge
Reflections
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36. Reflection
1. Are you good at influencing people to
your way of thinking?
2. Do any of these principles surprise
you?
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37. Reflection
3. Which principle(s) do you master well
already?
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38. Reflection
4. Growth Opportunities:
◦ Pick 2 principles to work on in the near
future
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39. Reflection
5. Which principle(s) are best to be
applied to friendship evangelism?
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