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Is that… Is that the official layout for the chapter
covers?? Why.. Why I think it is! *Tears up and sings
Adele* It’s so beautiful…
LAST TIME: Our Founder: Adam, and his wife: Tara, had
three kids: Hailey, Amanda, and Dennis. And they have one
more on the way because I’m nice like that. On to the
show!
Hey there Adam. What do you think about having another kid on the
way?
Well… It feels pretty good I ‘spose. ‘Cept it means I’m not gonna be this
dashingly handsome for much longer.
Handsome? You were handsome?? When?!
Ha! But no, I love having babies! I’m a Family Sim!
But Hailey’s gonna be a teenager soon… You know what that means.
Pimples, depression, and college?
And BOYS!! WOOO!!
Oh, I’m not worried about that.
Why not?
Because, if anyone touches her. I’ll kill em.
*dun dun dun*
Kill them?? Well… I expected as much, but sheesh Adam. How will the
legacy continue if you kill all prospects?
I won’t kill all of them. Just the ones that show up before my girls are 50.
And Dennis?
Well, that’s different. It’s his job to not touch/hurt the girl. He can find
whoever, as long as he’s nice.
Uh… I’d say that’s sexist but… I’m not quite sure.
Well while you figure it out, I’m gonna harvest my hard work ^_^
“You’re gonna be a little heartbreaker kiddo. All the girls will want you
but you’ll be a one woman man. And their parents are all gonna wish
they had a kid like mine!”
Unless he’s a Romance Sim…
“Not happening.”
“Hello?”
“Hi… Is this…. Hailey?”
“Yup, who’s this?”
“It’s uh.. It’s Chloe. The girl who was at your brother’s party. Say, are you
growing up soon?”
“Yup! I’m going to be a teenager tomorrow!!”
“Oh, well do you mind if-”
“Oops sorry, I gotta go! My dad’s home!”
“Hey dad, how was work??”
“Good. Now listen up pup, you’re gonna be a teenager real soon and I’m gonna set
some ground rules right now. And I want you to promise you won’t break them.”
“I promise Dad, what are the rules?”
“One, no boys til college. And that’s a stretch.”
“No problem dad! Boys are weird. Except Denny, I like him.”
“And two always remember you love me and I love you.”
“That one’s easy dad! I’ll love you forever!”
“Ah, we’ll see… Now run along and try some fishing so your mom and I can catch up.”
Womp womp wawawawa. Tough luck kid, better luck next time.
“No way. I’m going to catch a fish. If it’s the last thing I do!!”
Is it really this drastic? It’s only fishing.
“But my dad can’t fish so who’s gonna be the fisher of the family?? I have
to do this. It’s my destiny.”
Uhh… Sure it is. But I don’t really see you-
“WAIT I GOT SOMETHING!!”
“AWWWW YEAAAAAAH!!! What now Chan?? WHAT NOW?!?!?!”
Eh, it’s not golden so it’s ok. Call me when you catch a whale, then I
might be a little more interested.
“Whatever! I’m gonna show my dad! He’ll be all like ‘Whoa there pup!
You fulfilled your destiny like a jackrabbit in a bunny race’ and stuff!”
After I cheered on Hailey for her latest accomplishment, catching a fish
(which I still haven’t done), I took some time to play with Dennis. In a
house full of women I try to make sure he has enough man time with his
Pop.
He’s a smart little thing too. Learns something new everyday!
Like, he said “Daddy” earlier today. That’s one of the best moments in my
life. I remember when Hailey first said Dada, I didn’t stop smiling for a
week!
A wise man once told me ‘You don’t know love til you’ve wiped someone’s
butt’ and it’s in moments like these that I realize how right he was.
Tara says the next, and last, little one is growing so fast she gets bigger
everyday. I almost walked into that trap. She waited for a response and
instead of saying, ‘Well… I do notice when the baby grows… for sure.’
I said, ‘Oh nonsense, you couldn’t look smaller if you tried.’
That one won and the prize was HooWoo!
The kids keep trying their hand at fishing. I think since Amanda is so
smart, she doesn’t want to fall behind Hailey too much. I caught her
sneaking off one night to fish.
If you can’t tell.. She has her mother’s brains and father’s luck.
The next day it was time! Adam was the only one not cheering… With a
lot on his mind, he could only watch in silence as his eldest child
became a teenager.
But when Hailey looked over at him, he snapped out of his sullenness
and grabbed a Twirl-Y-Thing-Y.
I’ll make you proud Dad. I promise I’ll love you forever and never let a boy
goose me, whatever that means.
Well I think she’s pretty! Unique pretty. It’s awesome how she grew
into the same hair too, makes my job easier. Those eyes though.
Miss “No Boys” rolled Pleasure LTW: 50 Dream Dates. HAHAHA!
Well, there goes one promise!
“Hey Joe! Can I ask a favor?”
“Sure pal, what is it?”
“Lend me your handcuffs?”
“Haha do I even want to know?”
“It’s nothing major, I’m just going to cuff my daughter to a pole til she’s
80!”
“HAHA, is that really necessary?”
“She’s a Pleasure sim, Joe. You tell me.”
“She could be just like a Family sim, who wants to earn her Dream Dates
with the love of her life.”
“…Or. She could be the type to run ramped through Veridian wearing only
a leaf and a block of cheese, yelling “I am Sundown, see me “Rise”!”
“What did you do in college??”
“Well kiddo, since Dad is going to be freaking out for the greater part of a
week, you’re gonna be the only boy I can touch for a while. So you better
get used to seeing this face!”
“Hailey nice!”
“Thanks buddy, I’m sure you’ll be nice too when you can make complete
sentences.”
“Hey Hailey..”
“I just wanted to give you your birthday gift.”
“For me?? What is it??”
“Open it and see.”
*opens… deflates.* “It’s a… A boot.”
“Not just any boot. The first boot I ever caught. I thought it might be
special to you since you caught a fish when you were a kid. Just a good
reminder of how strong and determined you are. If times get rough and
what not.”
“And although you’re probably going to break the first promise in an
hour, I’ll still hold up my end of the bargain.”
“Oh dad. I love you too.”

Her eyes wouldn’t. Close…. Ever. O_O
The rest of the party was a hit.
Hailey wasted no time making friends.
“Let’s play with balls!”
People enjoyed our tv.
“Oh mi gawd, the Biebs is like so hawt.”
*gag*
Tara made food that made me… friends…
“Your daughter is hot!”
Joe gained a new partner.
“I hear their bed floats.”
“No.”
Tara earned… Some amount of money and she was so excited that she…
Rewarded me. Which I don’t understand but I appreciate all the same.
“I’m more ready for you than ever little one. With Hailey all grown up, we
need more babies around here. And maybe another boy to level the
stakes.”
“But we’ll love you all the same.”
“Perhaps. We’ll see.”
“Adam!”
“That’s why ya married me!”
“No, I married you to buy you a bigger bed. I had no idea I’d have kids
with you!”
All in all, Hailey enjoyed her party and we got the doo-hicky!
“Hey, when did this happen? He’s supposed to grow up today?”
“Beats me, Father. I’ve been SKILLING MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD AWAY! So I
wouldn’t know.”
Are you complaining about lack of face time??
“YES!!!! I would enjoy being a part of this story as well you know.”
Blah blah blah. Lot of complainers you are.
“YAY! Maybe now I can get more facetime!”
Err… No. I think you look like your father… But Adam is hot. You are an
odd thing.
“I think I have character!”
You got something kid. You got something.
*Time lapse; Location change; POV alternation; Keep up*
It’s still technically my birthday. So I head downtown to find some new
clothes. I mean really, maxis premades?? No. If I’m gonna find a boy, I
have to be flashy and hot! Oh! Maybe I’ll find one downtown.
This place sucks! The only people here are some blonde, Jesse McCarthey
reject. An old lady with a purse and someone named, “Match maker.”
What a weird name. I’ll just buy a phone and get out of here. Maybe
school will bring me more luck.
*Back at home*
“There! This takes away from my nose, right??”
Yeah, but I still know it’s there… Where did it come from?? Is that what
Adam is gonna look like? WHAT HAVE I DONE??
*aside from Tara* “I think you look fine, sweety. Don’t mind Chan!”
Hey you. Don’t teach your children not to mind me! I am to be very
much minded! And another thing, those pjs are very old fashion. You
look like an American Apparel model. I know you have three kids but-
“If I could just interrupt for a second Chan.”
This better be darn good.
“It is. I’m oh you know.. HAVING A BABY!!!!”
“ *girly squeal* A baby??!?!?!”
It’s a girl! Meet Laura Devereaux. The VERY LAST framming baby. She
has Adam’s hair and Tara’s eyes! And… Tara where’s your husband?
“He was literally right behind me!!”
Adam! What are you doing??
“Well I’m hungrier than a pig on a diet Chan, I need to eat.”
You’re cheating! You’re getting the Aspiration from Laura’s birth
without actually seeing it.
“I’ll see her eventually. After three kids, you kinda know the drill!”
“Take her.”
“B- but I’m-”
“No buts. She’s yours. I’m bored.”
“How can you be bored?? You just made her!!”
“My fun is in red Adam, and unless you want a PPSD wife you better GIVE
ME A COUPLE HOURS OF TV!!!!!””
“Well… I guess it’s just you and me little one. It’s alright though. This
doesn’t mean mommy doesn’t love you. But just that I love you more.”
Adam!
“What? I was only-”
Not that. I just noticed.. Your nose! And eyes! That’s where they got it
from. I never really noticed til now!! Whoa. That’s interesting.
“Hey mom, can I ask you a question?”
“Can it wait til “Sim and Order: Pleasant View” goes off?”
“Uhh… It’s about dad saying he wants to handcuff me to a pole.”
“Adam! You said you wanted to handcuff your daughter to a pole??”
“He thinks I’m gonna be frisky.”
“Is that true Adam?”
“Yeah. *nomnomnom*”
“Vaquero, she has to grow up eventually.”
“NO. No growing up!”
“Well… I do remember when she was in diapers… Such the cutest tushy!”
“UGHHHHHHHH!!! You guys are SO embarrassing!!!!”
“And when she would play in the tub for hours pretending to be a pirate.
D’AWWWWW!!!”
“I’m going to bed.”
“Adam… Our daughter is hot.”
“UGHHHH, I know, she’s beautiful. Why couldn’t we get an ugly one??”
You got Dennis.
“Why is my only boy unattractive??”
Only kidding. He’s ok.
“Don’t listen to Chan. You knew this day was coming up…”
“She could’ve rolled knowledge. Or hell, even popularity!”
“But she didn’t. She rolled Pleasure and that’s what we have to deal
with.”
“Me thinks you need to just accept what you can’t change. She rolled
what she rolled and as her parents we just have to love her and make
sure she doesn’t have a baby by some random townie.”
“Oooor, we could just keep her sheltered for the rest of her life and keep
every boy away from her.”
“Adaaaam…”
“Fine fine. I’ll try to deal with it… It’s just hard.”
“I know. But you’ll be fine. If not, we’ll just have another!”
No.
“Night Vaquero.”
Why couldn’t she just stay a baby…
The next day before school, Adam takes advantage of some Father-Son
time with Denny. He was not prepared for the turn the conversation
took however…
“Dad, I have a question.”
“Shoot kiddo.”
“What’s “goosing?”
“Uh… Err… What?”
“Goosing. I was talking to Amanda and she said that when we grow up
we can’t goosed because that’s where babies come from and that you
told Hailey she couldn’t.”
“What?? How do kids come up with this stuff… Um.. Well. She’s right.
You definitely shouldn’t get goosed, but her even more so. With you, it
would be kind of weird but, actually kind of-… Never mind. Go to school.
Learn math.”
“Bye dad! I’m gonna go tell my friends about goosing!”
“Uh.. Don’t.. Fine. See you at 7 pup.”
I hope he doesn’t goose the bus driver. I wouldn’t poke her with a 10 foot
stick.. By ten foot stick I mean my-
Go to work you nasty!
“ *evil grin* I’d say I didn’t mean what you think I mean.. But I totally did.”
The Boot Strikes Back: Return of the Mold
Well hello Randy/Orlando. Rando.
“Hi!”
Haha, you’re happy…. That will change before this chapter is
over. Hailey brought him home…. Muhahahaha
Aaaand Marsha’s back.
“How come you’re not showing my face??”
We all know what you look like kid. I actually might even marry
you in later if you’re lucky. But for now, I don’t want any funny
business!
“That’s right. Shower me in praise. I am as amazing as I was predicted to be.
That’s it. I can just hear it now. The cheers, the applause, the… adulation!
Give it up, to moi. I rule.”
Too bad there’s no one here.
“You’re here Chan. That’s aaaall that matters!”
“Dad dad! They love me! Everyone thought I was so smart because I
know about grown up stuff!”
“That’s great lad, but do me a favor. Keep that under wraps until after
the Head Master leaves, please?”
“And this is the nursery- oh oops. Sorry honey and Mr. HM.”
“Oh no, don’t worry about it! This room just exemplifies everything we
look for at my school!”
“Uh.. Your school exemplifies… Naked babies?”
“Well, quite frankly, yes! A+ Mr. Devereaux, A+!”
*Amanda* “zZZMooooooooooooomZzz”
“*whispers* And this is the last stop of the tour”
“*even lower whisper* You need not have taken me this far. You won me
over at naked babies!”
“So promotions huh, they’re awesome right? My family we get loads of
promotions because both of my parents work hard and-”
“Ms. Hailey, you can stop schmoozing now, you’re already in. That naked
baby was outstanding!”
“Oh thank goodness. I wanna go on a date now!”
*Randy thinking* “YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”
“Alright, I’m gonna teach you both how to do homework. What do we
have tonight?”
“Logarithms for me.”
“Beethoven’s 5th for me.”
“….Tara! The kids need help with their homework.”
“Rando, you stink. You’ve been here for THREE days. GO HOME!”
“But I still haven’t gotten my date yet.”
“Or a shower! Maybe that’s why she won’t ask you out!! LEAVE!”
“I’ll be back.”
“Hey Adam!”
“Oh hey Phil how’s it going?”
“Pretty well. I’m making pie tonight, you in?”
“Absolutely buddy, wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
“Sir, I do not want a dishwasher when I have a sink.”
*over phone* “But. Come on! It’s shiny!!”
“You’re making my teeth go through my chin. Call back when you have
something worthy of my time. And dentures!”
“Who the heck got married???”
This was one of the only times I’ve gotten a parent to cheer for their kid
when they got good grades. In the history of my simming, the parents
are always either asleep or doing something else so they always end up
cheering an empty room.
It was birthday time for Amanda… And I’m scared. I already failed on
Hailey’s birthday. I don’t know if I can handle two teenage girls. If she
rolls Romance, she’s going to college immediately. And who is that
random townie boy who looks a lot like Rando?? HE BETTER NOT BE
HERE FOR AMANDA OR I SWEAR I’ll… I’ll.. Something.
Hey pal, you’re here to claim her already?? She’s barely a teen
yet!
“Uhhhhhh.”
This one is harmless Adam, really.
She definitely grew into those eyes! AND rolled Knowledge!!
With some type of LTW.. I slacked off on note taking for like 3
generations. Bear with me.
Then later that night Laura grew up looking a lot like her
Daddy.
She’s 2/8/5/6/7. Those were about the only notes I had this
generation.
And it seems like we have another genius on our hands! Hey
little one, what’re you playing? Bach? Beethoven? Nickelback??
“Elmo!”
Well… There’s always time.
“Morning Tara, how’s it going?”
“Really well thanks. But I’m afraid I can’t talk right
now Joe, I have to go be Super Mom for a bit while
my husband is at work.”
She potty trains Laura
Then teaches her to walk. All on one Smart Milk!
Ugh I love you Tara. You’re such an awesome
Mom.
“Just doing my job!”
“Hey I do stuff too ya know. Like make money and what not.”
Yeah and singe off our eyebrows with your stench. I frown upon you.
*Crumplebottom face*
“Aw now that ain’t far. I’m trying to be permaplat!”
Blah blah blah.
Hailey spends more time with Laura than you do.
That’s great! The more time she spends with babies the less
time she’ll spend with that Rando character! But… I admit, I do
feel pretty bad.
What if I’m a bad father? I spend hardly any time with my toddler. I’m
always shunning my first born. I haven’t even heard of Amanda since she
hit teen. I’m doing terribly.
You aren’t buddy. You’re just earning money for the family so we can
finally get a new car. Don’t worry about it. You’re doing fine.
Err… Well… Ok this one doesn’t count. Any other time you’re
doing just fine.
*wail* UGHHH I’m a terrible parent!!!!
“There you go kid. Sleep in a crib, not a potty. And don’t worry. From
now on, any time Daddy has is going to be spent on making sure you
don’t pass out. I won’t let this memory haunt you forever. Things will get
better.”
“Daddy. *pass out*”
WHOA WHOA! What about all that junk about being a better dad???
What? I’m only greeting her.
I see those bolts Mister. I don’t want any funny business!
I’m a Family Sim Chan. I only got eyes for Tara. Partly because she’d rip
em out if I ever cheated but somewhat for love.
Adaaaam.
Whaaaat?
You better be chucking hearts about Tara!
The world may never knoooow. Muhahahahahaha.
Hey!
Kidding!
D’awwww! Super mom. Better than your no good husband.
“He wouldn’t cheat. He’s much too afraid.”
Bolts don’t lie Tara. Bolts don’t lie.
“Neither does murder. Isn’t that right little one?”
“Yeah! Muhdar!”
Speaking of murder. Wait til your father catches you.
Oh who cares? I’ve been holding off for as long as I could. He’ll
just have to get over it.
“So, you know what they say about Pleasure Sims?”
“No, what?”
“We have a very particular set of skills. Skills that make us a dream come
true for people like you.”
“People like me??”
“Just go with it.”
****
I really wanted to use the Taken monologue. Why? I’m not
even sure. But It just seemed like it fit a Pleasure sim! Don’t
judge me.
This can’t end well. Not with Adam as her dad. Muhahaha I
can’t wait!!!
Yes! I made him fall in love! Score one for the Hailster!
You don’t love him??
No, what’re you nuts? I just need someone to give me easy
dream dates.
No lie, there was not a heart in sight for Hailey! She’s cruel!!
“Ooooh, you’re gonna get it Hailey. You know how your dad feels about
dating.”
“Oh shut up. I saw you trying to hit on my dad. How do you think my mom
would feel about that?”
“Well, I..”
“Yeah. Ok.”
“So you wanna be my boyfriend?”
“Of course!! I love you!!”
“Alright, you just have to meet my parents now.”
Actions have consequences kiddo.
Yeah yeah. What’s the worst that could happen?
You’ll see.
“Dude are you nuts??”
“Uhhhh.”
“You got a legacy girl. Do you even know what they say about their dad??”
“No… Does it matter?”
“YES! He’s insane. Like mental asylum escapee insane.”
“Don’t talk about my girlfriend’s dad like that Meadow! He’s not crazy.”
“Pft yeah right. You just wait. I’d understand if you got the middle girl.
But you got his first born. He’s going to rip you to shreds!!!”
“Whatever Meadow, you’re just jealous that you didn’t get me.”
“Ha, yeah. Sure I am.”
“Well it’s nice to finally, officially meet you Rando.”
“You as well Mrs. Devereaux.”
“Ah such a gentleman. Let’s see if that holds up when my husband gets
home from work.”
“Heh heh… Yeah..”
“No Joe, I haven’t even seen the kid in days! Maybe he learned his lesson.
I told you nobody would touch my girl.”
“You mean Hailey?”
“Yeah. Hold on Joe. You’ve heard something, little girl?”
“Haha, oh yeah. She has a boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend? Joe I’ll call you back. TARA!!!”
“So, this lass just told me that Hailey had a boyfriend… Isn’t that
funny?? HAHA the stories some kids come up with! Right
honey? Honey?”
“Err… Well..”
“Where is he? I’ll kill him. I’ll slice his fingers into bits and make him eat
them so he knows the true definition of finger food.”
“Vaquero… Aren’t you overreacting just a little?”
“Overreacting?? I NEVER OVER REACT! See, this isn’t Over. Reacting.”
“Well since you’re so calm, I’m gonna call him in. And you’re gonna play
nice. For your daughter’s sake.”
“Rando this is my husband. Adam, this is Rando.”
“Hello Mr. Devereaux.”
“Put ‘er there, pup.”
“Haha! I knew you weren’t crazy. A handshake. That’s simple enough…”
Uh oh.
…
Sucker. I’m a Cowboy. Rule #1: Expect the unexpected. HA! The
unsuspecting idiot. Hailey has got to have better taste.
“Adaaam.”
“Waaaaaaaaaaah!! You are crazy!”
“Damn right and don’t you forget it! You better spread the word to all the
other little kids who think they’re good enough for my daughter. You
aren’t! None of ya!”
“Now get the hell out of here before you leave in a body bag!!”
*Randy runs home crying*
“I thought we agreed you would play nice.”
“I’m a cowboy. Nice ain’t in my blood, lass. And they best remember
that.”
“Wow, I’ve never heard you have such a strong accent.”
“It’s saved for special occasions, like this one here.”
“You’re never gonna let her date, are you?”
“Probably not.”
“Hey! I finally get some face time!!”
Make it count kid.
“Well today I-”
Next time: Generation one gets ready to go to college and maybe Denny
will get more facetime. Will Rando stay around? Will Adam face
consequences for his actions? Will Laura glitch herself into a coma??
Find out all this and less!
Seriously though… This girl is the glitchiest tot I’ve ever played!

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Bawse legacy chapter 1.3

  • 1. Is that… Is that the official layout for the chapter covers?? Why.. Why I think it is! *Tears up and sings Adele* It’s so beautiful… LAST TIME: Our Founder: Adam, and his wife: Tara, had three kids: Hailey, Amanda, and Dennis. And they have one more on the way because I’m nice like that. On to the show!
  • 2. Hey there Adam. What do you think about having another kid on the way? Well… It feels pretty good I ‘spose. ‘Cept it means I’m not gonna be this dashingly handsome for much longer. Handsome? You were handsome?? When?! Ha! But no, I love having babies! I’m a Family Sim!
  • 3. But Hailey’s gonna be a teenager soon… You know what that means. Pimples, depression, and college? And BOYS!! WOOO!! Oh, I’m not worried about that. Why not? Because, if anyone touches her. I’ll kill em. *dun dun dun*
  • 4. Kill them?? Well… I expected as much, but sheesh Adam. How will the legacy continue if you kill all prospects? I won’t kill all of them. Just the ones that show up before my girls are 50. And Dennis? Well, that’s different. It’s his job to not touch/hurt the girl. He can find whoever, as long as he’s nice. Uh… I’d say that’s sexist but… I’m not quite sure. Well while you figure it out, I’m gonna harvest my hard work ^_^
  • 5. “You’re gonna be a little heartbreaker kiddo. All the girls will want you but you’ll be a one woman man. And their parents are all gonna wish they had a kid like mine!” Unless he’s a Romance Sim… “Not happening.”
  • 6. “Hello?” “Hi… Is this…. Hailey?” “Yup, who’s this?” “It’s uh.. It’s Chloe. The girl who was at your brother’s party. Say, are you growing up soon?” “Yup! I’m going to be a teenager tomorrow!!” “Oh, well do you mind if-” “Oops sorry, I gotta go! My dad’s home!”
  • 7. “Hey dad, how was work??” “Good. Now listen up pup, you’re gonna be a teenager real soon and I’m gonna set some ground rules right now. And I want you to promise you won’t break them.” “I promise Dad, what are the rules?” “One, no boys til college. And that’s a stretch.” “No problem dad! Boys are weird. Except Denny, I like him.” “And two always remember you love me and I love you.” “That one’s easy dad! I’ll love you forever!” “Ah, we’ll see… Now run along and try some fishing so your mom and I can catch up.”
  • 8. Womp womp wawawawa. Tough luck kid, better luck next time. “No way. I’m going to catch a fish. If it’s the last thing I do!!” Is it really this drastic? It’s only fishing. “But my dad can’t fish so who’s gonna be the fisher of the family?? I have to do this. It’s my destiny.” Uhh… Sure it is. But I don’t really see you- “WAIT I GOT SOMETHING!!”
  • 9. “AWWWW YEAAAAAAH!!! What now Chan?? WHAT NOW?!?!?!” Eh, it’s not golden so it’s ok. Call me when you catch a whale, then I might be a little more interested. “Whatever! I’m gonna show my dad! He’ll be all like ‘Whoa there pup! You fulfilled your destiny like a jackrabbit in a bunny race’ and stuff!”
  • 10. After I cheered on Hailey for her latest accomplishment, catching a fish (which I still haven’t done), I took some time to play with Dennis. In a house full of women I try to make sure he has enough man time with his Pop. He’s a smart little thing too. Learns something new everyday!
  • 11. Like, he said “Daddy” earlier today. That’s one of the best moments in my life. I remember when Hailey first said Dada, I didn’t stop smiling for a week! A wise man once told me ‘You don’t know love til you’ve wiped someone’s butt’ and it’s in moments like these that I realize how right he was.
  • 12. Tara says the next, and last, little one is growing so fast she gets bigger everyday. I almost walked into that trap. She waited for a response and instead of saying, ‘Well… I do notice when the baby grows… for sure.’ I said, ‘Oh nonsense, you couldn’t look smaller if you tried.’ That one won and the prize was HooWoo!
  • 13. The kids keep trying their hand at fishing. I think since Amanda is so smart, she doesn’t want to fall behind Hailey too much. I caught her sneaking off one night to fish. If you can’t tell.. She has her mother’s brains and father’s luck.
  • 14. The next day it was time! Adam was the only one not cheering… With a lot on his mind, he could only watch in silence as his eldest child became a teenager.
  • 15. But when Hailey looked over at him, he snapped out of his sullenness and grabbed a Twirl-Y-Thing-Y. I’ll make you proud Dad. I promise I’ll love you forever and never let a boy goose me, whatever that means.
  • 16. Well I think she’s pretty! Unique pretty. It’s awesome how she grew into the same hair too, makes my job easier. Those eyes though. Miss “No Boys” rolled Pleasure LTW: 50 Dream Dates. HAHAHA! Well, there goes one promise!
  • 17. “Hey Joe! Can I ask a favor?” “Sure pal, what is it?” “Lend me your handcuffs?” “Haha do I even want to know?” “It’s nothing major, I’m just going to cuff my daughter to a pole til she’s 80!”
  • 18. “HAHA, is that really necessary?” “She’s a Pleasure sim, Joe. You tell me.” “She could be just like a Family sim, who wants to earn her Dream Dates with the love of her life.” “…Or. She could be the type to run ramped through Veridian wearing only a leaf and a block of cheese, yelling “I am Sundown, see me “Rise”!” “What did you do in college??”
  • 19. “Well kiddo, since Dad is going to be freaking out for the greater part of a week, you’re gonna be the only boy I can touch for a while. So you better get used to seeing this face!” “Hailey nice!” “Thanks buddy, I’m sure you’ll be nice too when you can make complete sentences.” “Hey Hailey..”
  • 20. “I just wanted to give you your birthday gift.” “For me?? What is it??” “Open it and see.” *opens… deflates.* “It’s a… A boot.” “Not just any boot. The first boot I ever caught. I thought it might be special to you since you caught a fish when you were a kid. Just a good reminder of how strong and determined you are. If times get rough and what not.”
  • 21. “And although you’re probably going to break the first promise in an hour, I’ll still hold up my end of the bargain.” “Oh dad. I love you too.” Her eyes wouldn’t. Close…. Ever. O_O
  • 22. The rest of the party was a hit. Hailey wasted no time making friends. “Let’s play with balls!”
  • 23. People enjoyed our tv. “Oh mi gawd, the Biebs is like so hawt.” *gag*
  • 24. Tara made food that made me… friends… “Your daughter is hot!”
  • 25. Joe gained a new partner. “I hear their bed floats.” “No.”
  • 26. Tara earned… Some amount of money and she was so excited that she…
  • 27. Rewarded me. Which I don’t understand but I appreciate all the same.
  • 28. “I’m more ready for you than ever little one. With Hailey all grown up, we need more babies around here. And maybe another boy to level the stakes.” “But we’ll love you all the same.” “Perhaps. We’ll see.” “Adam!”
  • 29. “That’s why ya married me!” “No, I married you to buy you a bigger bed. I had no idea I’d have kids with you!”
  • 30. All in all, Hailey enjoyed her party and we got the doo-hicky!
  • 31. “Hey, when did this happen? He’s supposed to grow up today?” “Beats me, Father. I’ve been SKILLING MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD AWAY! So I wouldn’t know.” Are you complaining about lack of face time?? “YES!!!! I would enjoy being a part of this story as well you know.” Blah blah blah. Lot of complainers you are.
  • 32. “YAY! Maybe now I can get more facetime!” Err… No. I think you look like your father… But Adam is hot. You are an odd thing. “I think I have character!” You got something kid. You got something.
  • 33. *Time lapse; Location change; POV alternation; Keep up* It’s still technically my birthday. So I head downtown to find some new clothes. I mean really, maxis premades?? No. If I’m gonna find a boy, I have to be flashy and hot! Oh! Maybe I’ll find one downtown.
  • 34. This place sucks! The only people here are some blonde, Jesse McCarthey reject. An old lady with a purse and someone named, “Match maker.” What a weird name. I’ll just buy a phone and get out of here. Maybe school will bring me more luck.
  • 35. *Back at home* “There! This takes away from my nose, right??” Yeah, but I still know it’s there… Where did it come from?? Is that what Adam is gonna look like? WHAT HAVE I DONE?? *aside from Tara* “I think you look fine, sweety. Don’t mind Chan!”
  • 36. Hey you. Don’t teach your children not to mind me! I am to be very much minded! And another thing, those pjs are very old fashion. You look like an American Apparel model. I know you have three kids but- “If I could just interrupt for a second Chan.” This better be darn good.
  • 37. “It is. I’m oh you know.. HAVING A BABY!!!!” “ *girly squeal* A baby??!?!?!”
  • 38. It’s a girl! Meet Laura Devereaux. The VERY LAST framming baby. She has Adam’s hair and Tara’s eyes! And… Tara where’s your husband? “He was literally right behind me!!”
  • 39. Adam! What are you doing?? “Well I’m hungrier than a pig on a diet Chan, I need to eat.” You’re cheating! You’re getting the Aspiration from Laura’s birth without actually seeing it. “I’ll see her eventually. After three kids, you kinda know the drill!”
  • 40. “Take her.” “B- but I’m-” “No buts. She’s yours. I’m bored.” “How can you be bored?? You just made her!!” “My fun is in red Adam, and unless you want a PPSD wife you better GIVE ME A COUPLE HOURS OF TV!!!!!””
  • 41. “Well… I guess it’s just you and me little one. It’s alright though. This doesn’t mean mommy doesn’t love you. But just that I love you more.” Adam! “What? I was only-” Not that. I just noticed.. Your nose! And eyes! That’s where they got it from. I never really noticed til now!! Whoa. That’s interesting.
  • 42. “Hey mom, can I ask you a question?” “Can it wait til “Sim and Order: Pleasant View” goes off?” “Uhh… It’s about dad saying he wants to handcuff me to a pole.”
  • 43. “Adam! You said you wanted to handcuff your daughter to a pole??” “He thinks I’m gonna be frisky.”
  • 44. “Is that true Adam?” “Yeah. *nomnomnom*” “Vaquero, she has to grow up eventually.” “NO. No growing up!” “Well… I do remember when she was in diapers… Such the cutest tushy!”
  • 45. “UGHHHHHHHH!!! You guys are SO embarrassing!!!!” “And when she would play in the tub for hours pretending to be a pirate. D’AWWWWW!!!” “I’m going to bed.”
  • 46. “Adam… Our daughter is hot.” “UGHHHH, I know, she’s beautiful. Why couldn’t we get an ugly one??” You got Dennis.
  • 47. “Why is my only boy unattractive??” Only kidding. He’s ok. “Don’t listen to Chan. You knew this day was coming up…” “She could’ve rolled knowledge. Or hell, even popularity!” “But she didn’t. She rolled Pleasure and that’s what we have to deal with.”
  • 48. “Me thinks you need to just accept what you can’t change. She rolled what she rolled and as her parents we just have to love her and make sure she doesn’t have a baby by some random townie.”
  • 49. “Oooor, we could just keep her sheltered for the rest of her life and keep every boy away from her.” “Adaaaam…” “Fine fine. I’ll try to deal with it… It’s just hard.” “I know. But you’ll be fine. If not, we’ll just have another!” No. “Night Vaquero.”
  • 50. Why couldn’t she just stay a baby…
  • 51. The next day before school, Adam takes advantage of some Father-Son time with Denny. He was not prepared for the turn the conversation took however…
  • 52. “Dad, I have a question.” “Shoot kiddo.” “What’s “goosing?” “Uh… Err… What?”
  • 53. “Goosing. I was talking to Amanda and she said that when we grow up we can’t goosed because that’s where babies come from and that you told Hailey she couldn’t.” “What?? How do kids come up with this stuff… Um.. Well. She’s right. You definitely shouldn’t get goosed, but her even more so. With you, it would be kind of weird but, actually kind of-… Never mind. Go to school. Learn math.”
  • 54. “Bye dad! I’m gonna go tell my friends about goosing!” “Uh.. Don’t.. Fine. See you at 7 pup.”
  • 55. I hope he doesn’t goose the bus driver. I wouldn’t poke her with a 10 foot stick.. By ten foot stick I mean my- Go to work you nasty! “ *evil grin* I’d say I didn’t mean what you think I mean.. But I totally did.”
  • 56. The Boot Strikes Back: Return of the Mold
  • 57. Well hello Randy/Orlando. Rando. “Hi!” Haha, you’re happy…. That will change before this chapter is over. Hailey brought him home…. Muhahahaha
  • 58. Aaaand Marsha’s back. “How come you’re not showing my face??” We all know what you look like kid. I actually might even marry you in later if you’re lucky. But for now, I don’t want any funny business!
  • 59. “That’s right. Shower me in praise. I am as amazing as I was predicted to be. That’s it. I can just hear it now. The cheers, the applause, the… adulation! Give it up, to moi. I rule.” Too bad there’s no one here. “You’re here Chan. That’s aaaall that matters!”
  • 60. “Dad dad! They love me! Everyone thought I was so smart because I know about grown up stuff!” “That’s great lad, but do me a favor. Keep that under wraps until after the Head Master leaves, please?”
  • 61. “And this is the nursery- oh oops. Sorry honey and Mr. HM.” “Oh no, don’t worry about it! This room just exemplifies everything we look for at my school!” “Uh.. Your school exemplifies… Naked babies?” “Well, quite frankly, yes! A+ Mr. Devereaux, A+!”
  • 62. *Amanda* “zZZMooooooooooooomZzz” “*whispers* And this is the last stop of the tour” “*even lower whisper* You need not have taken me this far. You won me over at naked babies!”
  • 63. “So promotions huh, they’re awesome right? My family we get loads of promotions because both of my parents work hard and-” “Ms. Hailey, you can stop schmoozing now, you’re already in. That naked baby was outstanding!” “Oh thank goodness. I wanna go on a date now!” *Randy thinking* “YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”
  • 64. “Alright, I’m gonna teach you both how to do homework. What do we have tonight?” “Logarithms for me.” “Beethoven’s 5th for me.” “….Tara! The kids need help with their homework.”
  • 65. “Rando, you stink. You’ve been here for THREE days. GO HOME!” “But I still haven’t gotten my date yet.” “Or a shower! Maybe that’s why she won’t ask you out!! LEAVE!” “I’ll be back.”
  • 66. “Hey Adam!” “Oh hey Phil how’s it going?” “Pretty well. I’m making pie tonight, you in?” “Absolutely buddy, wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
  • 67. “Sir, I do not want a dishwasher when I have a sink.” *over phone* “But. Come on! It’s shiny!!” “You’re making my teeth go through my chin. Call back when you have something worthy of my time. And dentures!”
  • 68. “Who the heck got married???”
  • 69. This was one of the only times I’ve gotten a parent to cheer for their kid when they got good grades. In the history of my simming, the parents are always either asleep or doing something else so they always end up cheering an empty room.
  • 70. It was birthday time for Amanda… And I’m scared. I already failed on Hailey’s birthday. I don’t know if I can handle two teenage girls. If she rolls Romance, she’s going to college immediately. And who is that random townie boy who looks a lot like Rando?? HE BETTER NOT BE HERE FOR AMANDA OR I SWEAR I’ll… I’ll.. Something.
  • 71. Hey pal, you’re here to claim her already?? She’s barely a teen yet! “Uhhhhhh.” This one is harmless Adam, really.
  • 72. She definitely grew into those eyes! AND rolled Knowledge!! With some type of LTW.. I slacked off on note taking for like 3 generations. Bear with me.
  • 73. Then later that night Laura grew up looking a lot like her Daddy. She’s 2/8/5/6/7. Those were about the only notes I had this generation.
  • 74. And it seems like we have another genius on our hands! Hey little one, what’re you playing? Bach? Beethoven? Nickelback?? “Elmo!” Well… There’s always time.
  • 75. “Morning Tara, how’s it going?” “Really well thanks. But I’m afraid I can’t talk right now Joe, I have to go be Super Mom for a bit while my husband is at work.”
  • 77. Then teaches her to walk. All on one Smart Milk! Ugh I love you Tara. You’re such an awesome Mom. “Just doing my job!”
  • 78. “Hey I do stuff too ya know. Like make money and what not.” Yeah and singe off our eyebrows with your stench. I frown upon you. *Crumplebottom face* “Aw now that ain’t far. I’m trying to be permaplat!” Blah blah blah.
  • 79. Hailey spends more time with Laura than you do. That’s great! The more time she spends with babies the less time she’ll spend with that Rando character! But… I admit, I do feel pretty bad.
  • 80. What if I’m a bad father? I spend hardly any time with my toddler. I’m always shunning my first born. I haven’t even heard of Amanda since she hit teen. I’m doing terribly. You aren’t buddy. You’re just earning money for the family so we can finally get a new car. Don’t worry about it. You’re doing fine.
  • 81. Err… Well… Ok this one doesn’t count. Any other time you’re doing just fine. *wail* UGHHH I’m a terrible parent!!!!
  • 82. “There you go kid. Sleep in a crib, not a potty. And don’t worry. From now on, any time Daddy has is going to be spent on making sure you don’t pass out. I won’t let this memory haunt you forever. Things will get better.” “Daddy. *pass out*”
  • 83. WHOA WHOA! What about all that junk about being a better dad??? What? I’m only greeting her. I see those bolts Mister. I don’t want any funny business! I’m a Family Sim Chan. I only got eyes for Tara. Partly because she’d rip em out if I ever cheated but somewhat for love.
  • 84. Adaaaam. Whaaaat? You better be chucking hearts about Tara! The world may never knoooow. Muhahahahahaha. Hey! Kidding!
  • 85. D’awwww! Super mom. Better than your no good husband. “He wouldn’t cheat. He’s much too afraid.” Bolts don’t lie Tara. Bolts don’t lie. “Neither does murder. Isn’t that right little one?” “Yeah! Muhdar!”
  • 86. Speaking of murder. Wait til your father catches you. Oh who cares? I’ve been holding off for as long as I could. He’ll just have to get over it.
  • 87. “So, you know what they say about Pleasure Sims?” “No, what?” “We have a very particular set of skills. Skills that make us a dream come true for people like you.” “People like me??” “Just go with it.”
  • 88. **** I really wanted to use the Taken monologue. Why? I’m not even sure. But It just seemed like it fit a Pleasure sim! Don’t judge me.
  • 89. This can’t end well. Not with Adam as her dad. Muhahaha I can’t wait!!!
  • 90. Yes! I made him fall in love! Score one for the Hailster! You don’t love him?? No, what’re you nuts? I just need someone to give me easy dream dates. No lie, there was not a heart in sight for Hailey! She’s cruel!!
  • 91. “Ooooh, you’re gonna get it Hailey. You know how your dad feels about dating.” “Oh shut up. I saw you trying to hit on my dad. How do you think my mom would feel about that?” “Well, I..” “Yeah. Ok.”
  • 92. “So you wanna be my boyfriend?” “Of course!! I love you!!” “Alright, you just have to meet my parents now.” Actions have consequences kiddo. Yeah yeah. What’s the worst that could happen? You’ll see.
  • 93. “Dude are you nuts??” “Uhhhh.” “You got a legacy girl. Do you even know what they say about their dad??” “No… Does it matter?” “YES! He’s insane. Like mental asylum escapee insane.”
  • 94. “Don’t talk about my girlfriend’s dad like that Meadow! He’s not crazy.” “Pft yeah right. You just wait. I’d understand if you got the middle girl. But you got his first born. He’s going to rip you to shreds!!!” “Whatever Meadow, you’re just jealous that you didn’t get me.” “Ha, yeah. Sure I am.”
  • 95. “Well it’s nice to finally, officially meet you Rando.” “You as well Mrs. Devereaux.” “Ah such a gentleman. Let’s see if that holds up when my husband gets home from work.” “Heh heh… Yeah..”
  • 96. “No Joe, I haven’t even seen the kid in days! Maybe he learned his lesson. I told you nobody would touch my girl.” “You mean Hailey?” “Yeah. Hold on Joe. You’ve heard something, little girl?” “Haha, oh yeah. She has a boyfriend.” “Boyfriend? Joe I’ll call you back. TARA!!!”
  • 97. “So, this lass just told me that Hailey had a boyfriend… Isn’t that funny?? HAHA the stories some kids come up with! Right honey? Honey?” “Err… Well..”
  • 98. “Where is he? I’ll kill him. I’ll slice his fingers into bits and make him eat them so he knows the true definition of finger food.” “Vaquero… Aren’t you overreacting just a little?” “Overreacting?? I NEVER OVER REACT! See, this isn’t Over. Reacting.” “Well since you’re so calm, I’m gonna call him in. And you’re gonna play nice. For your daughter’s sake.”
  • 99. “Rando this is my husband. Adam, this is Rando.” “Hello Mr. Devereaux.” “Put ‘er there, pup.” “Haha! I knew you weren’t crazy. A handshake. That’s simple enough…” Uh oh.
  • 100. … Sucker. I’m a Cowboy. Rule #1: Expect the unexpected. HA! The unsuspecting idiot. Hailey has got to have better taste.
  • 101. “Adaaam.” “Waaaaaaaaaaah!! You are crazy!” “Damn right and don’t you forget it! You better spread the word to all the other little kids who think they’re good enough for my daughter. You aren’t! None of ya!”
  • 102. “Now get the hell out of here before you leave in a body bag!!” *Randy runs home crying* “I thought we agreed you would play nice.” “I’m a cowboy. Nice ain’t in my blood, lass. And they best remember that.” “Wow, I’ve never heard you have such a strong accent.” “It’s saved for special occasions, like this one here.” “You’re never gonna let her date, are you?” “Probably not.”
  • 103. “Hey! I finally get some face time!!” Make it count kid. “Well today I-”
  • 104. Next time: Generation one gets ready to go to college and maybe Denny will get more facetime. Will Rando stay around? Will Adam face consequences for his actions? Will Laura glitch herself into a coma?? Find out all this and less! Seriously though… This girl is the glitchiest tot I’ve ever played!