The document discusses divorce options and considerations for choosing an approach. It outlines the key options as litigated divorce, collaborative divorce, mediator-assisted divorce, one lawyer divorce, and do-it-yourself divorce. Each approach is described in terms of process, costs, ability to meet goals of fairness, customization, comprehensiveness, practicality and cost-effectiveness. The document advises choosing an option based on individual circumstances and need for power balancing, and offers the mediator or attorney as a resource to help initiate collaborative or mediated processes.

1. I’m Getting Divorced So, what’s next? A presentation by Just Mediation, LLC “Helping People Tackle Problems Instead of Each Other” ©2010 by Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

2. Divorce Options What are my options? And how do I choose? ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

3. Key Considerations FAIR Need to protect both spouses and children, now and in the future Need to embrace values and unique circumstances of the individual family COMPREHENSIVE Need to provide workable roadmap for present and future needs Need to provide closure and finality COST EFFECTIVE Need for efficient, streamlined process Need to ensure that optimum use has been made of services engaged OTHER GOALS Protect privacy Support spouses and children through the divorce transition Provide a more positive framework for future dealings © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

4. Key Considerations DIVORCE IS A SERIOUS LEGAL MATTER! Legal rights need to be protected Divorce has long term consequences Penny Wise can be Pound Foolish HOW CAN I KNOW WHAT LEVEL OF PROTECTION I NEED? © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

5. The Options:A Quick overview (with more detail later) LITIGATED DIVORCE COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE MEDIATOR ASSISTED DIVORCE THE ORIGINAL COST-CUTTER (Just one lawyer) PURELY DO-IT-YOURSELF, WITHOUT ASSISTANCE © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

6. Goals A DIVORCE SOLUTION IDEALLY WILL BE FAIR TO BOTH PARTIES REFLECTIVE OF FAMILY’S INDIVIDUAL NEEDS, CIRCUMSTANCES, AND VALUES PROVIDE FINALITY (COMPREHENSIVE, ENFORCEABLE) WORKABLE COST EFFECTIVE © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

7. Is Divorce Mediation Right For Me? Most divorce cases will be settled through negotiation, using either mediators or attorneys! The issue is not whether, but when, negotiation or mediation will occur. The crucial questions are: “How much assistance do I need from attorneys and the judicial process for this life changing event?” and “Do I settle my case before, or after, legal procedures have been set in motion and with, or without, attorney guidance?” © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

8. Ask not whether you will mediate …Ask when and how you want to mediate © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

9. One Size Does Not Fit All! Some cases require much more assistance than others with either legal advice, judicial process, or both How can I tell in advance how much assistance I will need from the court system? ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

11. threats

12. demands out of proportion to needPower Balanced / Umbalanced ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

14. Are you aware of what you would be entitled to?

15. What more information do you need to make a sound decision?©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

16. The Power/Information GridWhere do I fall? Power balanced Power unbalanced Aware of options Unaware of options © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

17. A Suggested Analysis ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

18. Balancing of Power If your relationship is in either of the lower of the two descriptions in this triangle, you should not attempt to negotiate your divorce without the help of an attorney. When power is not balanced in a relationship, the force of the law is necessary to protect the rights of the less empowered spouse. The further down on the triangle your relationship is, the more intervention and assistance you will need from the court system to ensure fairness of result. © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

19. Divorce Mediation Utilizing Attorney and Legal Process If you feel you are in the bottom tier on this triangle, then you need the services of an attorney and judicial process to ensure that power is balanced during your divorce negotiations. This is not to say that your divorce cannot be mediated. Rather, your attorney will utilize legal tools such as financial discovery, to balance access to information and increase confidence and ability to negotiate. Most divorce cases that go through the court system are, eventually, settled through mediation, but only after full discovery and financial disclosure has been completed. © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

20. Collaborative Divorce If you are in the middle tier of this triangle, judicial process may be needed, but perhaps can be avoided if both spouses commit to and participate in full disclosure . The assistance of an attorney is helpful in cases falling in the middle, to ask the hard questions and pursue full disclosure. Collaborative Divorce is the best option for cases where power is balanced and both spouses are committed to fairness, but they’re not quite sure what is fair, when spouses want to have attorneys negotiate on their behalf. . . © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

21. Mediator Facilitated Divorce using unbundled legal services and other professional services If you and your spouse are both willing to make full disclosure, if you both seek to be fair, and you want to do what is best for the family regardless of what a court of law might order, then mediated divorce may be a good option for you. Either or both spouses may consult an attorney at any stage and involve the attorney in negotiations. And, an attorney may be utilized to formalize the divorce agreement into a final divorce decree. Financial, counseling, and other experts are utilized as needed to assist the family in making adjustments and reaching agreements. © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

22. Litigated Divorce(with trial) A FULLY LITIGATED, ADVERSARIAL DIVORCE WITH TEMPORARY AND FINAL COURT HEARINGS Parties engage in court ordered Discovery, including Interrogatories, Requests for Admission, and Depositions Private investigators and financial experts are utilized, deposed, and testify A Guardian Ad Litem is often utilized to investigate and testify concerning what is generically labeled “child custody” Temporary and Final Court Hearings are held The court calls the shots and makes the decisions Attorneys give clients advice, and operate within the analytical framework of positions that are largely determined by what a court would order Cost: $15,000 - $40,000 per side © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

23. Litigated Divorce(without trial) FULLY LITIGATED, ADVERSARIAL PROCESS … THAT SETTLES AHEAD OF COURT DATE Parties engage in court ordered Discovery, including Interrogatories, Requests for Admission, and Depositions Private investigators may be utilized and deposed Financial experts are utilized and deposed A Guardian Ad Litem is often utilized to investigate and report Temporary hearing is held, with terms of order decreed by judge Whatever is ordered in the temporary hearing becomes the status quo The court calls the shots and makes the decisions until … Evaluative style mediation occurs just prior to final hearing is used to generate attorney / judicially-oriented settlement options Cost: $10,000 - $20,000 per side © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

24. Collaborative Divorce COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE: AN ATTORNEY-DIRECTED PROCESS Parties each retain their own, collaboratively trained attorney Parties agree to principles of fairness and full disclosure The parties agree to share and take advantage of expertise of subject matter experts, such as accountants and child specialists The attorneys may recommend individual helpers such as divorce coaches or vocational rehabilitation experts The parties, and all professionals, agree to settle the case out of court Attorneys direct the process and negotiate on behalf of clients Average cost: $5,000 - $10,000 per side, depending on services needed © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

25. Mediator With Unbundled Services MEDIATOR ASSISTED DIVORCE AGREEMENT UTILIZING UNBUNDLED LEGAL SERVICES Parties commit to principles of fairness and agree to full disclosure A transformative style mediator assists the parties in understanding their conflict better, in developing processes for resolving conflict, and in reaching agreement that will become their divorce decree Experts are engaged as needed to assist parties in reaching fair, comprehensive agreements covering every aspect of their divorce: financial and tax experts, child psychologists, individual therapists, vocational experts, and attorneys to whatever extent they are needed Cost: $500 - $4,500 per side, depending on services needed © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

26. Just One Lawyer THE ORIGINAL COST CUTTER: JUST ONE LAWYER The parties agree between themselves on terms of settlement and engage an attorney just to draft the agreement The attorney can only represent one side. The non-hiring spouse is unrepresented or engages a different attorney on an hourly basis to review the settlement papers There is no mechanism for disclosure or discovery of financial assets Outside experts are not utilized for help in formulating financial or parenting plans or for adjustment and re-employment issues If talks break down, divorce becomes contested and both sides must hire lawyers Cost: $1,500 - $3,000 per side, unless the process falls apart © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

27. DIYD: Do It Yourself Divorce DO-IT-YOURSELF DIVORCE Parties reach agreement by themselves Parties draft their own agreement Parties file their own court papers, and appear in court pro se Parties may receive advice from an attorney on an hourly basis Cost: about $150 - $500 per side (depending on legal services hired) © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

28. How does each meet key goals? Fairness Custom Fit Comprehensive Practical Cost Effective ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

29. FAIRNESS ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

30. CUSTOM FIT © 2010 by Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

31. COMPREHENSIVENESS © 2010 by Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

32. PRACTICAL © 2010 by Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

33. COST EFFECTIVENESS © 2010 by Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

34. So Again, the Options:Which seems right for you? LITIGATED DIVORCE FULLY LITIGATED, ADVERSARIAL DIVORCE WITH TEMPORARY AND FINAL COURT HEARINGS, OR FULLY LITIGATED, ADVERSARIAL PROCESS THAT SETTLES AHEAD OF COURT DATE COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE: Divorce negotiation directed by attorneys and assisted by neutral experts, with an (enforceable) agreement not to go to court MEDIATOR ASSISTED DIVORCE UTILIZING UNBUNDLED LEGAL SERVICES THE ORIGINAL COST-CUTTER: Just one lawyer PURELY DO-IT-YOURSELF, WITHOUT ASSISTANCE © Just Mediation, LLC, 2010. For more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

35. Collaborative or Mediated Divorce:How Do I Talk To My Spouse About It? Getting all parties to the negotiating table is the first, and sometimes the most challenging, task for the mediator or negotiator The same approaches to solving problems will not work. You know this, because you’ve already tried the tools in your own tool kit. If you got along, you wouldn’t need a mediator or negotiator. If you propose a collaborative divorce or mediated divorce, the mediator or attorney will be happy to contact your spouse and send information ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185

36. Conclusion Divorce is very serious, with long term consequences for you and every member of your family The same solution does not fit everyone Choose carefully depending on your circumstances, paying special heed to your need for directive advice and your need for help balancing power In collaborative or mediated cases, your attorney or mediator can help with convening For more information about mediation or conflict transformation in general, please see www .xanskinner.com Thank you for your time! WHAT ARE MY DIVORCE OPTIONS? IN CONCLUSION: A presentation by Just Mediation, LLC “Helping People Tackle Problems Instead of Each Other” ©Just Mediation, LLC, for more information: www.JustMediationLLC.com 803-414-0185